What It Takes to Become Great | Donald Suxho

- People are wishful thinkers,

but they hate to take the steps,

or they take the steps and it's hard.

Change is hard.

People comes a certain point, they break.

Everything is making up your mind mentally

and not giving up,

but also physically pushing through

your hardship when it hurt.

(applause)

- Everybody, welcome to Impact Theory.

Our goal with this show and company

is to introduce you to the people

and ideas that will help you

actually execute on your dreams.

Today's guest is one of the most

decorated volleyball players in U.S. history.

His rise to prominence, however, was deeply improbable.

He grew up hard in Communist controlled Albania.

Even though his father was a volleyball coach,

there was very little opportunity in their homeland.

After the fall of Communism,

the country was thrown into such chaos

that in a desperate attempt to find

an outlet for his talents,

he was forced to risk his life

just for an opportunity to compete.

He snuck over the mountains into Greece

to try out for a team there,

and during his trip he was shot at,

hunted by soldiers and chased by dogs.

Even though that didn't stop him,

intense racial tensions between the two countries

saw him rejected without serious consideration,

despite his obvious talent.

Devastated, he made his way back home

and realizing that bigger opportunities lay elsewhere,

he and his family fled to the U.S. not long after.

Once in America, he began to flourish

and quickly made a name for himself on the volleyball court,

ultimately being offered a full ride scholarship to USC.

He was a starting player there

for the nationally ranked team

all four years he was there,

and set a number of school records,

including 164 career aces.

He was a two time All American

and his senior year he was named

the AVCA National Player of the Year.

Following graduation, he played professionally

in both Poland and Italy,

and was a member of the U.S. National Team

for 12 straight years.

He played as a captain in two different Olympic games.

As a professional player, he led his team to victory

in the prestigious Italian Cup.

Please, help me in welcoming the 2012

U.S. Men's Most Valuable Volleyball Player Donald Suxho.

(applause)

- How are you?

- Get in there.

- Very good, thank you for having me.

- Good, thanks for being here man.

- Glad to be here, thank you, appreciate it.

- You're one of the rare people

that I've gotten to know ahead of time,

gotten a chance to sit down and pick your brain,

and hear a little bit about your story.

It is insanity.

It's literally insane.

I wore this shirt in your honor

because your life is the answer

to the question no bullshit, what would it take?

First of all, tell me what it was like

growing up in Communist Albania.

- Growing up, as a young kid, it was beautiful.

We didn't know anything else.

We had a great family, great sports, was very quiet.

There was no crime, was clean.

The only thing that I noticed being young,

we were always hungry.

Food was scarce and I didn't know why.

I didn't know why my parents didn't have enough food,

but we were happy.

We were running around the neighborhoods,

playing sports, hiking on the weekends,

and going to school, having a ton of different friends.

But every time, my dad who used to wake me up

early in the morning at 4:30, 5, to go buy food.

That, to me, sounded really strange.

Why we have to get food so early?

I realized that afternoons,

when we go to the same store, there's no food left.

I would watch my dad just give me his ration of food,

his cup of water or tea, steak we had once a week,

to me because he knew I was growing, to me and my brother.

That was really strange.

What I remember too, growing up,

that it was one way of thinking.

The government, we're owned by the government,

as I realized earlier when I was a teenager

was that there was one way of thinking.

One way of doing things.

The government or the city council

told you exactly how to think,

how to behave, how to smile,

what music to listen, what TV channel to watch,

and how to react at school too,

for different types of news.

That was very isolating.

The ceiling was really low.

There's no thought process to innovate,

of create, or wanted to be the best,

because if you went against the government rules,

then you'd be thrown in jail,

or your parents would go to jail.

It was very surreal to not have dreams.

Growing up, we had no toys, no cartoons.

We had one TV channel, one music channel.

Everything was made in Albania,

from Albanians, by Albanians,

didn't know the outside world at all.

We had one pair of shoes, one outfit a year

that the government give us or my parents would buy.

That's all we know.

There's no shoes to go out in the snow.

Where I grew up was big snow, kind of cold weather.

I remember every night I'd come back home

from practice or school,

I was just soaking wet from socks and shoes

to everything else.

We'd dry them and wear them again the next day.

It was just harsh.

It was very hard growing up.

- What was it like when you finally

got out from under that,

and you start to have dreams,

and you start to think like,

whoa, my life could be more than this?

Was there a moment where you were like,

wait a second, I can do whatever I want?

- But I didn't know how.

I didn't know what the world meant.

The world was a chaos for me.

As a young kid, people with guns, people getting shot,

my friends getting stabbed in front of me,

people getting killed.

We have a coffee or talk in a coffee shop,

people would just drive by and shoot.

Not because they hated each other,

it was just people were wild.

They didn't know what to do, how to react.

Their brain couldn't take it.

Their mindset was completely off.

- I find that super interesting,

especially because you then go to the U.S.,

and your first reaction isn't oh my God, this is amazing.

You're like, "I hate this."

Help us understand.

What do you go through mentally,

cause I think this'll reveal the

way that the human mind works,

the hunger for the familiar,

the not knowing what to do when

you have intense pressure and then no pressure.

You come to America and then what?

What are you going through mentally?

- The first month, people helped out.

The church, the cousins give us clothes, a house.

I was sleeping with my parents in one room.

After the first month, my cousin,

with a beautiful Oldsmobile comes in,

is like, "Are you happy?

"Are you good?"

It's like, "My God, I love America.

"My family's, this is awesome."

He said, "Okay, well tomorrow you're gonna work."

I'm like, "Work, why?"

He's like, "Who's gonna pay for this?"

"Well, you."

I'm like, "You have a nice house.

"You have a nice car.

"Why am I supposed to work?

"I'm 17, I want to play volleyball."

He laughed at me.

He said, "Welcome to America, son.

"You gotta work and pay for your stuff."

That changed my life forever,

because from that moment on until now,

that sentence that has kept me alive.

The true capitalism.

The pure capitalism.

You get up, you work, and you pay for your own stuff.

- You said in Communism you didn't have mindset.

What do you mean by mindset?

- Mindset to think, mindset to get better,

to be the best, to dream, to work hard.

It was pure Communism.

You work seven hours.

You get a set amount of money.

The government tells you this is your apartment

for the next 50 years 'til you die.

You get a pension, you die.

- You've come to America,

you end up doing extraordinarily well.

What is the mindset that you begin to build

that allows you to have that kind of extraordinary success?

- Once I saw you, right,

let's say I saw Tom having a nice car,

or seeing all these kids have cars

and a girlfriend, and flowers, and prom.

I'm like, wait a second, why you have that and I don't?

I start asking this question to these people

and I realize how the process was.

I start learning the American mindset.

That's when I started detaching myself

from being Albanian to becoming American.

I made a pact with myself.

I say, if I want to be successful in America,

I got to be American.

Keep my tradition at home, but once I step out of the house,

I want to learn everything.

How to speak, how to act, how to behave,

how to have a girlfriend, how to work better,

more effective like I do.

My third job was a waiter at the

Greek restaurant in Edick.

All of the sudden, I'm making

thousands of dollars a month

because I was working three jobs.

I'm like, is this real?

Do I belong here?

Am I American?

Not yet, but I was on the road to become American.

- How did you deal with that self doubt?

That's something that we'll get to again

when we talk about your injuries,

but how do you deal with self doubt,

of asking yourself do I belong?

Am I as good as these people?

How do you overcome that?

- In my opinion, you overcome it by work.

Hard work and honor.

I wanted to be successful.

Self doubt is very dark places.

At night, when I was young kid,

there in Greece or Albania or Boston,

you always doubt yourself.

Even in the Olympics, you always doubt yourself.

Am I supposed to be here?

The next morning I'll get up and say,

"You know what?

"This week I made x amount of dollars,

"I want to make more because I want this."

I wanted to prove myself.

Those people that are making fun of me,

those people that cut me,

those people that told me I would never make it,

I'll use that and get up in the morning

and outwork everybody else around me.

Once I saw the opportunities,

I said there's no way you're going to beat me.

You might be better than me now,

but I'll just pure outwork.

Pure get up and outwork you,

day in and day out.

One of my dad's teammates had gone to Greece

and sent letters.

Back then, we just had handwritten letters.

And said, this is one opportunity out for your son.

Bring him to Saloniki, Greece, which was near my city.

By car was 12 hours, I think, or 14 hours.

My dad searched around and some of our friends

usually do this business,

bring people over the mountain for jobs

and criminal activities, whatever you call it.

He said, "Son, this is it.

"We have no future here, there's nothing.

"There's no money.

"There's no rule of law.

"There's nothing."

"I mean, what are you gonna do, play volleyball?"

Nobody was playing sports.

Said you gotta go.

We had guns and people were chasing us.

It took us, I don't know, we left at 6 p.m.,

we got in at 7 a.m. I think, or 8 a.m.

I don't remember the time,

but was when there was sun.

As we go over the mountains

and we see this black Mercedes.

It was a beautiful Mercedes, which was crazy.

This massive, big Mercedes.

I do the math and I look around.

I'm like, holy crap, we got 12 people.

Where they gonna fit?

My body was, my hey you was like,

go first so you go in first in the car.