#5. Meet Tyler
VOICE: If you are seated in an emergency exit row and you would be unable or unwilling to perform the duties listed on the safety card, please ask a flight attendant to reseat you.
JACK: It's a lot of responsibility.
TYLER: Wanna switch seats?
JACK: No. I'm not sure I'm the man for that particular job.
TYLER: An exit-door procedure at 30,000 feet.
TYLER: The illusion of safety.
JACK: Yeah, I guess so.
TYLER You know why they have oxygen masks on planes?
JACK; So you can breathe.
TYLER: Oxygen gets you high. in a catastrophic emergency you take giant panic breaths. Suddenly you become euphoric, docile. You accept your fate. It' s all right here. Emergency water landing, six hundred miles per hour. Blank faces. Calm as Hindu cows.
JACK: That's an interesting theory.
JACK: What do you do?
TYLER: What do you mean?
JACK: What do you do for a living?
TYLER: Why? So you can pretend you're interested?
JACK: OK.
TYLER: You have a kind of sick desperation in your laugh.
JACK We have the exact same briefcase.
TYLER: Soap.
JACK: Sorry?
TYLER: I make and I sell soap.
JACK; And this is how I met Tyler Durden.
TYLER: Did you know if you mix gasoline and frozen orange juice, you can make napalm?
JACK: No, I did not. Is that true?
TYLER: That's right. one can make all kinds of explosives with simple household items.
JACK: Really?
TYLER: If one was so inclined.
JACK: Tyler, you are by far the most interesting single-serving friend I've ever met.
JACK: You see, , everything on a plane is single-serving...
TYLER: I get it. Very clever.
JACK: Thank you.
TYLER: How's that working out for you?
JACK: What?
TYLER: Being clever?
JACK: Great.
TYLER: Keep it up, then. Right up.
TYLER: Now it is the question of etiquette. As I pass, do I give you the ass or the crotch?
JACK: How I came to live with Tyler is... Airlines have this policy about vibrating luggage.
JACK: Was it ticking?
SECURITY: Actually, throwers don't worry about ticking. Modern bombs don't tick.
JACK: Sorry?
Throwers?
SECURITY: Baggage handlers. But when a suitcase vibrates, the throwers have to call the police.
JACK: My suitcase was vibrating?
SECURITY: Nine time out of ten, it's an electric razor. But, every once in a while it's a dildo. It's company policy not to imply ownership in the event of a dildo. We use the indefinite article: "A dildo." Never "Your dildo."
JACK: I don't own...
JACK: I had everything in that suitcase. My C.K. shirts... my D.K.N.Y. shoes... My AX ties.
JACK: Never mind.
