The Power of Vulnerability | Kerri Walsh Jennings

- If I'm doing something, I'm doing it to win it,

whatever winning it means, and to me,

I'm not going for silver.

Like, I'm not going for bronze.

I'm not going for fifth.

I'm not going for the experience.

I'm doing it for the growth along the way, absolutely,

because I love growing as a human being.

If I fell short, it's not gonna be a failure.

(audience cheers and applauds)

- Hey everybody, welcome to Impact Theory.

You're here, my friends, because you believe

that human potential is nearly limitless,

but you know that having potential's not the same

as actually doing something with it, so our goal

with this show and company is to introduce you

to the people and ideas that will help you

actually execute on your dreams.

All right, today's guest is arguably the greatest

beach volleyball player the world has ever seen.

Together with her longtime partner, Misty May-Treanor,

they absolutely dominated the sport for more than a decade,

winning 21 consecutive Olympic matches

and three back-to-back gold medals, losing only

a single set in their entire 11-year run as teammates.

She is one of only two people ever to be a four-time

all-American volleyball player, and she has

an Olympic bronze medal to go with her three golds,

making her the single most decorated

female Olympic beach volleyball player ever.

Not bad considering she's played injured and even pregnant.

Her work ethic, unending drive, and raw horsepower

have made her not only a fan favorite, but someone

who has literally transcended the sport.

She's been sponsored by some of the biggest

and most well-respected companies on the planet,

including Lululemon, Pampers, and The Honest Company

to name but a few, and she's become a household name,

not only for her unprecedented string of victories,

but for her infectious positive attitude,

grace in defeat, and unyielding determination.

Even now as she's about to turn 40, she continues

to push the limits of both herself and her sport

and is preparing to make a run at an astonishing

sixth Olympic appearance as we head

towards the 2020 games in Tokyo.

Absolutely consumed by a desire to get better every day

despite six surgeries on her shoulder and having appeared

in her first Olympics before many of her fellow competitors

were even born, she continues to be

one of the most elite athletes on the beach today.

And even though she hasn't even retired yet,

she recently launched a platform and movement

called P1440 that is poised to revolutionize

the entire sport of beach volleyball.

So, please, help me in welcoming the Stanford grad,

mother of three, and one of the greatest athletes of our

generation, regardless of the sport, Kerri Walsh Jennings.

(audience applauds)

- Oh my goodness.

You make me wanna go work out.

- That's the perfect reaction to that.

- Oh, jeez, put me in, coach.

I'm ready.

- That is exactly it.

- Man, life is so good.

That's a lot.

- Wow, that's a, that is a lot,

and it was leaving things out, and I love that response.

And I've seen you talk about that before, where it's like,

you'll hear something in an interview,

something that you did,

and be like, that makes me wanna go push harder and do more.

Where does that drive come from?

- Man, well, I feel like I'm kind of preaching

to the choir here with, you know, self motivation,

and this intrinsic motivation that I have

to experience my potential and keep, you know, up in that.

I just love what I do, and I love life,

and I feel like my life is so damn simple

with regard to what I want.

You know, I want great relationships.

I wanna kick ass in my career, and I wanna stay connected

to my faith, and within those three simple things,

like, I live this really profound life,

and I don't want it to stop.

Like, I don't care the obstacle.

Like, I've had a lot of obstacles.

I've made many more great moments than obstacles,

but I'm just fucking hungry for more,

'cause I keep growing, you know?

- You've walked about finding your joy.

So, how did you do that, 'cause a lot of,

like, one of the number one questions I get asked

is how to find that, how to find happiness,

how to find passion.

So how did you create that,

find that, whatever the case may be?

- I was born with it.

I was certainly born with joy.

It was bred into me by my parents,

and I grew up in the most loving, unconditionally loving

environment and supportive environment possible, truly.

My parents are rock stars.

I have four siblings who are incredible,

a million cousins and aunts, and I was just always taught,

like, and shown that life is meant to be lived with joy.

You know, when you're doing something,

what's the point of doing it of A, you're not going to win,

and B, you're not going to have fun, you know?

And so I just feel like it's a bit of nurture

and it's a bit of nature, and I keep creating

and finding these environments where that's a constant.

- So it's one thing to know it.

It's another thing to actually cultivate it

and create it in your life.

In fact, I have a quote from you,

my weaknesses were exposed, and it's a gift.

And I thought, wow, that's like,

I get it when you say that you were born into joy

and that your family obviously did a lot

to make sure that they helped you bring that out,

but that, that goes beyond just like, life is good

and goes to like, a really intense and, it seems,

cultivated mindset.

So what's been your process to get to the point

where you can actually say the sentence in all seriousness,

my weaknesses were exposed, and that's a gift?

- You know, I, I feel things very deeply,

and, like, my experience is I don't necessarily

think really deeply about experiences,

but I fucking feel them.

And I know that through every experience,

whether it's good and I'm triumphant or bad and I'm exposed,

there's opportunity in every single thing, no matter

what the face of it is, you know, defeat or victory.

And I've had just, my life, I've lived a lot of contrast,

and by contrast, that means obstacles,

that means injuries, that means failures,

that means, you know, I have heartbreak.

And within that, having lived it truly

and like letting myself feel exposed and vulnerable

and letting myself learn and be devastated,

I've learned that there's fucking positives,

and it fortifies you for whatever's next.

And there's always something that's next.

You know, I'm never gonna get to a place and be like,

I'm here, I'm done, you know, let's call it quits.

Like, I'm in it for the long haul,

and I don't care, I'm gonna be 90 years old

on my way to heaven still learning,

because that, to me, is what life is about.

And so, when I say that my weaknesses were exposed

and there's strength in it, it's,

I believe in it with all my heart, you know?

Like, when there's a highlight on you

and it's the softest part of you and you therefore

have to look at it and either train it better

or figure out why it's weak or whatever it is,

if you take advantage of that,

that's a beautiful, powerful thing, you know?

- I really agree with that, and I don't know

if you follow MMA at all, and I cannot believe

I'm blanking on her name right now,

but she was crazy dominant.

She had the arm bar.

Like, she could just arm bar anybody to death.

- Ninja?

- Basically.

And she was undefeated, forever, ever, ever,

and it was just amazing.

And then she lost in a spectacular fashion,

came back, and then lost again,

and then just disappeared.

And everybody's like, she's never gonna come back from this.

And, I don't know enough about the situation

to like give a detailed account, but from the outside,

judging by what she said in interviews, it was

an unwillingness to face that it was entirely her fault.

- Yeah.

- That she just, there were skills that she never

took the time to develop, to actually get good at.

So, knowing that, I think that's a far more typical way,

like, looking at the amount that you won, the fact

that you lost one set, one set in 11 years, is so crazy.

- Man, Austrian sisters.

That pisses me off.

(both laugh)

- But like, that string of success does not set you up

to handle failure well, and yet, in failure,

you've been astonishing.

Like, I know you deal with sports psychology a lot.

- Mmhmm.

- Like, what, how can you pass that

onto anybody watching right now?

Like, what's that, how did you process the failure?

- I think it's just accountability and ownership

of your part in any situation that is a failure.

You know, myself on the court, I'm there to perform.

I'm there to, you know,

elevate my partner's play and our team play.

And if I'm failing, then am I gonna blame her?

Am I gonna blame the sun in my eyes?

Like, then I'm a victim, and then I have no power.

Same thing with relationships.

You know, right before you came on here,

I was telling you about my husband.

We just got in a fight,

and I always wanna take accountability of my shit,

you know, and am I allowed to cuss?

I'm so sorry.

- Go crazy, go as crazy...

- The role model in me is like, stop saying it.

- We had David Goggins on here.

It's like, yeah, go nuts.

- You did.

I was just saying, I can't wait to hear you guys together.

Was that fucking explosive?

- Oh, he is amazing.

It was.

He, he is unreal.

- I bet, he is unreal.

- But he swears a lot, so you're all right.

- I know, but there's something so pure and true about it.

- [Tom] I'll give you that.

- And I don't mean to sound, you know, unintelligent

and ridiculous.

- That actually sounds really interesting,

and I don't wanna derail you from your point,

but I will say that that you saying there's something

pure and real, like, that's a part of your personality

hopefully we can really explore in this interview,

'cause I find it fascinating.

So I think of, and now I really am

derailing you from your point.

- Please, 'cause I lost it already.

(both laugh)

- I think of the mind as like a pachinko machine.

Have you ever seen those things, you drop a ball or whatever

and it bounces around.

So you start with a negative idea, whatever that's gonna be,

and then you create all these points of positivity

that that negative thing bounces around,

and then by the end, it's turned into a positive thought.

Another way to think of it is mental jiu jitsu.

- Okay.

- So I've seen now so many interviews on you,

and I've seen you, one of the most fascinating things

is to watch your talk about getting the bronze evolve

and how you talked about it in the beginning

versus how you talk about it now,

which is pretty interesting.

- Yeah, I'm still working through it.

- And I, and I get that.

And the ability to be vulnerable and to always be looking

for the positive in something seems incredibly wise.

Is that intentional for you?

- Man, no, I think it's how I'm wired.

I think it's how I'm wired, to see the positive

in any situation, and I think I've learned the hard way

that focusing in the negative is gonna keep you there.

You know, I'm a really big believer

in the law of attraction, you know, what you focus on