What the English?! #2: Bigfoot

Hello fellow weirdos, and welcome to episode two of the “What the English? !” podcast.

This podcast is for intermediate English learners who want to listen to interesting, thought-provoking and sometimes weird content spoken in clear and natural English.

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In today's episode I'm going to talk about a creature that some people think is a total legend, made up, not real at all. There are many who think these creatures exist though, and there are some who claim to have seen them with their own eyes.

There are a few animals that live in the forests of North America that make me nervous: mountain lions, also known as cougars, bears, wolves, but what about a large, ape-like creature covered in fur? Well, many don't believe I should be worried about this last one, the legendary bigfoot, or sasquatch as it's also known.

Now, I'm not saying I'm a bigfoot believer necessarily, so don't worry, this episode isn't going to be about convincing you to believe too. Let's just say I have an open mind when it comes to things like this - having an open mind means you are willing to listen to what people have to say about it and haven't made your mind up yet. You might be closed-minded when it comes to legends like bigfoot, but I don't think you would be listening, if that were the case. Anyway, let's discover more about the bigfoot or sasquatch…

The word “Sasquatch” is a Native American word meaning “wild man”. In fact, there are more than sixty different words for the bigfoot across the different native people of North America. There have been numerous sightings of this “wild man” across the continent of North America.

So what exactly does Bigfoot look like? Well, if we look at the reports made by people who think they have seen Bigfoot, he averages seven feet ten inches tall, is hunched over and resembles an ape, completely covered in fur, most commonly reported as black or dark brown. There have been sightings of Sasquatch with light brown, grey and even white fur, but most reports and images show a creature with black or very dark brown fur.

Bigfoot stands on his back two legs, like humans, and if you get close enough to him you are in for an unpleasant surprise: his odour. The word odour, that might be new to you. It means smell. So Bigfoot stinks, basically.

If you ever get close enough to a Bigfoot to see his face, you will be welcomed by a big forehead, deep-set eyes, a square jaw and dark skin. Some people who claim to have seen the creature report blue eyes, some say he has a human-like nose.

Ok, I know what you're wondering, I'm wondering it too: how can it be possible in today's world that a creature can be so elusive, which means difficult to find or catch?

Well, Bigfoot enthusiasts, those people who are convinced that the creature exists, will tell you that it's because the Bigfoot is very rare, shy and smart enough not to get too close to humans. After all, there are reports of Bigfoot sightings in North America every year. There's even a group called the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization, or the BFRO, who call themselves “The only scientific research organization exploring the Bigfoot/Sasquatch mystery.” They have a website and Twitter account that I will link to in the description if you're interested. Their Twitter account logs Bigfoot sightings as they are reported. As of right now, the last reported sighting was on Halloween night, October 31 near Logan, Ohio. Apparently multiple witnesses staying in a cabin in the forest saw the wild man.

Let's dig deeper into the mystery of the Bigfoot and learn about some of the most credible sightings over the last fifteen years. Then maybe you can decide for yourself if you're going to join the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization or get an “I brake for Bigfoot” bumper sticker for your car after this episode or just go on living your life sure that there is no ancient and elusive ape-man roaming the forests of North America and that people who believe otherwise are gullible. Gullible is a great word, it means a person who believes things easily. We all know someone who could be described as gullible. They fall for pranks every time and believe things most people would see through straight away.

Here are five Bigfoot sightings from the past fifteen years in The United States that might make you a believer…

May, 2011 - New Smyrna Beach, Florida

I've used three names in this episode so far: Bigfoot, Sasquatch and wild man. In Florida, a south-eastern state full of swampland, Bigfoot is known by the name Skunk Ape. This is because the creature apparently smells just as bad as a skunk.

In May of 2011, a group of fishermen were in a boat in a mangrove swamp and suddenly, roughly 100 yards away, they all three of them spotted what they first thought was a bear or a hog… then it stood up.

The witnesses reported the creature as the size of a fridge-freezer with a muscular body, big beard and hairless forehead. They said it looked at them for about 15 seconds, made a grunting sound and then walked into the bushes.

How far is 100 yards exactly? Well, the Statue of Liberty in New York is around 100 yards high, so is the Big Ben clock in London, so that gives you an idea. What do you think? Too far away to get a good idea of what they were seeing? Close enough? I guess there are lots of factors to consider, like how good was the eyesight of these three men? What were the weather conditions like that day, and, let's be real here, how many beers had you had, guys? They were fishing after all.

October, 2010 - Hugo, Oregon

Oregon is a state in the north-east of the US. A local deer hunter was in the woods early, around 7.15, looking for the perfect spot to wait for deer. Then about 10 yards away, which is about half as long as a bowling lane so not far away, the hunter saw a creature. He described it as between 7 and 7.5 feet tall, and around 500 pounds. It was muscular, covered with dark fur, with long arms and a slight hunch.

Kind of sounds like he's describing a bear, right? It would make sense as bears also walk on their back legs sometimes. Well, the witness told researchers that he has seen many bears over the years, and that what he saw that morning most definitely was not one. He was about to get his camera out but the creature ran off. The hunter told researchers at the BFRO “"I used to think that Sasquatch couldn't exist because there would be tons of pictures, but now I can see why that isn't true."

September, 2009 - Twin Lakes, Colorado

So far we haven't heard anything about any sightings of what could be described as a female Bigfoot. Well, on September 1, 2009 in the tiny town of Twin Lakes, which has a population of 185, a woman reported seeing just that.

This Twin Lakes local was driving to her job in a neighbouring town at around 6.15 in the morning. She was feeling pretty tired so pulled over to get some air. In a field across from where she had parked her car the woman saw a creature with cinnamon-coloured fur standing just like a human. She told BFRO researchers that the creature had a large pair of breasts. So there we have it, female Bigfoot. The witness was so amazed and sure of what she had seen that she said “my life is forever changed.”

What do you think, did this woman see a Sasquatch, or is this a classic case of not enough coffee in the morning.

January, 2008 - Scorpio, Utah

Imagine your driving along a foggy road at 1:30 in the morning, just trying to deliver your load of potatoes, when suddenly you see something with glowing eyes on the side of the road. You switch on your high beams, those super bright lights, and a huge creature runs out in front of your truck. You'd probably be pretty freaked out!

Well that's what happened to one truck driver in the early hours of January 8, 2008. The man told the BFRO that the creature was around 8 to 10 feet tall, and between 600 to 800 pounds, which is as heavy as a horse. It had black hair and big eyebrows, and long, lanky arms that were much longer than a human's. The Bigfoot, or whatever it was, got as close as six feet from the witness's truck and the trucker was so alarmed he almost crashed. Luckily he was able to stay in control of the vehicle and stop safely, then the creature was nowhere to be seen.

Before this encounter the witness had been a skeptic, meaning he didn't believe, when it came to Bigfoot. Now though he is a firm believer. “It scared the hell out of me,” he reported.

September, 2007 - Cloverdale, California

So far our witnesses have been members of the public, but for sightline number five in this list we're going to hear the story of a Bigfoot sighting from a police officer.

This officer was on patrol in Cloverdale, California when he saw something on the side of the road. He stopped his patrol car and saw a creature walking upright that was 6 to 7 feet tall. It was covered with thick brown matted fur and had leaves and grass on its back. It moved slowly back into the bushes on the side of the road and was gone.

The police officer didn't want to say what he had just seen on the radio, maybe his fellow officers would make fun of him or think he had gone crazy, so he made this anonymous tip to the BFRO. Anonymous might be a new word to you. It means unknown, or not identified. You could say “the poem's author is anonymous” or “If you call the police about a crime, you can remain anonymous.”

So, there we have it, five sightings of Bigfoot, Sasquatch, the wild man, whatever you want to call this shy, ape-like creature. Have they made you believe? Maybe you hadn't heard of Bigfoot before this episode and now you're going to join the BFRO.

As for me, I'm not sure that reading about these sightings has convinced me that the wild man exists. I live in the Pacific Northwest, right next to a wooded area that leads into the mountains, bigfoot's territory. My theory is that most sightings of Bigfoot have been bears or deer. We get bears in our backyard every summer, standing up on their back legs to get apples from the tree. If it were dark and I were tired, I could see how a bear could look like a Bigfoot.

The thing that makes me the most skeptical: why haven't we found any Bigfoot bones? I guess they could go off and die in secluded places, deep in the forest.

I continue to have an open mind about Bigfoot. But until I see one for myself, I have to say I'm leaning toward this being a legend.

Is there a similar legend to Bigfoot where you're from? Perhaps you're one of the lucky, or maybe unlucky, people who have witnessed a Bigfoot. If so, I would love to hear about it in the comments.

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See you next time.