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Through the Looking-Glass, Chapter 4. Tweedledum And Tweedledee

Chapter 4. Tweedledum And Tweedledee

Chapter 4. Tweedledum And Tweedledee

THEY were standing under a tree, each with an arm round the other's neck, and Alice knew which was which in a moment, because one of them had "DUM" embroidered on his collar, and the other "DEE". 'I suppose they've each got "TWEEDLE" round at the back of the collar,' she said to herself. They stood so still that she quite forgot they were alive, and she was just going round to see if the word "TWEEDLE" was written at the back of each collar, when she was startled by a voice coming from the one marked "DUM". 'If you think we're wax-works,' he said, 'you ought to pay, you know. Wax-works weren't made to be looked at for nothing. Nohow.' 'Contrariwise,' added the one marked "DEE", 'if you think we're alive, you ought to speak.' 'I'm sure I'm very sorry,' was all Alice could say; for the words of the old song kept ringing through her head like the ticking of a clock, and she could hardly help saying them out loud: Tweedledum and Tweedledee Agreed to have a battle! For Tweedledum said Tweedledee Had spoiled his nice new rattle . Just then flew down a monstrous crow , As black as a tar-barrel ! Which frightened both the heroes so , They quite forgot their quarrel .' 'I know what you're thinking about,' said Tweedledum; 'but it isn't so, nohow.' 'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic.' 'I was thinking,' Alice said politely, 'which is the best way out of this wood: it's getting so dark. Would you tell me, please?' But the fat little men only looked at each other and grinned.

They looked so exactly like a couple of great schoolboys, that Alice couldn't help pointing her finger at Tweedledum, and saying 'First Boy!' 'Nohow!' Tweedledum cried out briskly, and shut his mouth up again with a snap.

'Next Boy!' said Alice, passing on to Tweedledee, though she felt quite certain he would only shout out 'Contrariwise!' and so he did.

'You've begun wrong!' cried Tweedledum. 'The first thing in a visit is to say "How d'ye do?" and shake hands!' And here the two brothers gave each other a hug, and then they held out the two hands that were free, to shake hands with her.

Alice did not like shaking hands with either of them first, for fear of hurting the other one's feelings; so, as the best way out of the difficulty, she took hold of both hands at once: the next moment they were dancing round in a ring. This seemed quite natural (she remembered afterwards), and she was not even surprised to hear music playing: it seemed to come from the tree under which they were dancing, and it was done (as well as she could make it out) by the branches rubbing one across the other, like fiddles and fiddle-sticks.

'But it certainly was funny,' (Alice said afterwards, when she was telling her sister the history of all this), 'to find myself singing " Here we go round the mulberry bush. " I don't know when I began it, but somehow I felt as if I'd been singing it a long long time!' The other two dancers were fat, and very soon out of breath. 'Four times round is enough for one dance,' Tweedledum panted out, and they left off dancing as suddenly as they had begun: the music stopped at the same moment. Then they let go of Alice's hands, and stood looking at her for a minute: there was a rather awkward pause, as Alice didn't know how to begin a conversation with people she had just been dancing with. 'It would never do to say "How d'ye do?" now ,' she said to herself: 'we seem to have got beyond that, somehow!' 'I hope you're not much tired?' she said at last.

'Nohow. And thank you very much for asking,' said Tweedledum. 'So much obliged!' added Tweedledee. 'You like poetry?' 'Ye-es, pretty well— some poetry,' Alice said doubtfully. 'Would you tell me which road leads out of the wood?' 'What shall I repeat to her?' said Tweedledee, looking round at Tweedledum with great solemn eyes, and not noticing Alice's question. '" The Walrus and the Carpenter " is the longest,' Tweedledum replied, giving his brother an affectionate hug. Tweedledee began instantly:

' The sun was shining —' Here Alice ventured to interrupt him. 'If it's very long,' she said, as politely as she could, 'would you please tell me first which road—' Tweedledee smiled gently, and began again:

'The sun was shining on the sea , Shining with all his might : He did his very best to make The billows smooth and bright — And this was odd, because it was The middle of the night . The moon was shining sulkily , Because she thought the sun Had got no business to be there After the day was done — "It's very rude of him", she said , "To come and spoil the fun !" The sea was wet as wet could be , The sands were dry as dry . You could not see a cloud, because No cloud was in the sky : No birds were flying overhead — There were no birds to fly . The Walrus and the Carpenter Were walking close at hand : They wept like anything to see Such quantities of sand : "If this were only cleared away ," They said, "it would be grand !" "If seven maids with seven mops Swept it for half a year , Do you suppose," the Walrus said , "That they could get it clear?" "I doubt it," said the Carpenter , And shed a bitter tear . "O Oysters, come and walk with us!" The Walrus did beseech . "A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk , Along the briny beach : We cannot do with more than four , To give a hand to each." The eldest Oyster looked at him , But never a word he said : The eldest Oyster winked his eye , And shook his heavy head — Meaning to say he did not choose To leave the oyster-bed . But four young Oysters hurried up , All eager for the treat : Their coats were brushed, their faces washed , Their shoes were clean and neat — And this was odd, because, you know , They hadn't any feet . Four other Oysters followed them , And yet another four ; And thick and fast they came at last , And more, and more, and more — All hopping through the frothy waves , And scrambling to the shore . The Walrus and the Carpenter Walked on a mile or so , And then they rested on a rock Conveniently low : And all the little Oysters stood And waited in a row . "The time has come," the Walrus said , "To talk of many things : Of shoes—and ships—and sealing wax — Of cabbages—and kings — And why the sea is boiling hot — And whether pigs have wings." "But wait a bit," the Oysters cried , "Before we have our chat ; For some of us are out of breath , And all of us are fat!" "No hurry!" said the Carpenter . They thanked him much for that . "A loaf of bread," the Walrus said , "Is what we chiefly need : Pepper and vinegar besides Are very good indeed — Now, if you're ready, Oysters dear , We can begin to feed." "But not on us!" the Oysters cried , Turning a little blue . "After such kindness, that would be A dismal thing to do!" "The night is fine," the Walrus said . "Do you admire the view ? "It was so kind of you to come ! And you are very nice!" The Carpenter said nothing but "Cut us another slice . I wish you were not quite so deaf — I've had to ask you twice!" "It seems a shame," the Walrus said , "To play them such a trick . After we've brought them out so far , And made them trot so quick!" The Carpenter said nothing but "The butter's spread too thick!" "I weep for you," the Walrus said: "I deeply sympathise." With sobs and tears he sorted out Those of the largest size , Holding his pocket-handkerchief Before his streaming eyes . "O Oysters," said the Carpenter , "You've had a pleasant run ! Shall we be trotting home again?" But answer came there none — And this was scarcely odd, because They'd eaten every one.' 'I like the Walrus best,' said Alice: 'because he was a little sorry for the poor oysters.' 'He ate more than the Carpenter, though,' said Tweedledee. 'You see he held his handkerchief in front, so that the Carpenter couldn't count how many he took: contrariwise.' 'That was mean!' Alice said indignantly. 'Then I like the Carpenter best—if he didn't eat so many as the Walrus.' 'But he ate as many as he could get,' said Tweedledum. This was a puzzler. After a pause, Alice began, 'Well! They were both very unpleasant characters—' Here she checked herself in some alarm, at hearing something that sounded to her like the puffing of a large steam-engine in the wood near them, though she feared it was more likely to be a wild beast. 'Are there any lions or tigers about here?' she asked timidly.

'It's only the Red King snoring,' said Tweedledee. 'Come and look at him!' the brothers cried, and they each took one of Alice's hands, and led her up to where the King was sleeping. 'Isn't he a lovely sight?' said Tweedledum.

Alice couldn't say honestly that he was. He had a tall red night-cap on, with a tassel, and he was lying crumpled up into a sort of untidy heap, and snoring loud— 'fit to snore his head off!' as Tweedledum remarked.

'I'm afraid he'll catch cold with lying on the damp grass,' said Alice, who was a very thoughtful little girl. 'He's dreaming now,' said Tweedledee: 'and what do you think he's dreaming about?' Alice said 'Nobody can guess that.' 'Why, about you !' Tweedledee exclaimed, clapping his hands triumphantly. 'And if he left off dreaming about you, where do you suppose you'd be?' 'Where I am now, of course,' said Alice. 'Not you!' Tweedledee retorted contemptuously. 'You'd be nowhere. Why, you're only a sort of thing in his dream!' 'If that there King was to wake,' added Tweedledum, 'you'd go out— bang!—just like a candle!' 'I shouldn't!' Alice exclaimed indignantly. 'Besides, if I'm only a sort of thing in his dream, what are you , I should like to know?' 'Ditto,' said Tweedledum. 'Ditto, ditto!' cried Tweedledee.

He shouted this so loud that Alice couldn't help saying 'Hush! You'll be waking him, I'm afraid, if you make so much noise.' 'Well, it's no use your talking about waking him,' said Tweedledum, 'when you're only one of the things in his dream. You know very well you're not real.' 'I am real!' said Alice, and began to cry.

'You won't make yourself a bit realer by crying,' Tweedledee remarked: 'there's nothing to cry about.' 'If I wasn't real,' Alice said—half laughing through her tears, it all seemed so ridiculous—'I shouldn't be able to cry.' 'I hope you don't suppose those are real tears?' Tweedledum interrupted in a tone of great contempt.

'I know they're talking nonsense,' Alice thought to herself: 'and it's foolish to cry about it.' So she brushed away her tears, and went on, as cheerfully as she could, 'At any rate, I'd better be getting out of the wood, for really it's coming on very dark. Do you think it's going to rain?' Tweedledum spread a large umbrella over himself and his brother, and looked up into it. 'No, I don't think it is,' he said: 'at least—not under here . Nohow.' 'But it may rain outside ?' 'It may—if it chooses,' said Tweedledee: 'we've no objection. Contrariwise.' 'Selfish things!' thought Alice, and she was just going to say 'Good-night' and leave them, when Tweedledum sprang out from under the umbrella, and seized her by the wrist. 'Do you see that ?' he said, in a voice choking with passion, and his eyes grew large and yellow all in a moment, as he pointed with a trembling finger at a small white thing lying under the tree.

'It's only a rattle,' Alice said, after a careful examination of the little white thing. 'Not a rattle- snake , you know,' she added hastily, thinking that he was frightened: 'only an old rattle—quite old and broken.' 'I knew it was!' cried Tweedledum, beginning to stamp about wildly and tear his hair. 'It's spoilt, of course!' Here he looked at Tweedledee, who immediately sat down on the ground, and tried to hide himself under the umbrella.

Alice laid her hand upon his arm and said, in a soothing tone, 'You needn't be so angry about an old rattle.' 'But it isn't old!' Tweedledum cried, in a greater fury than ever. 'It's new , I tell you—I bought it yesterday—my nice NEW RATTLE!' and his voice rose to a perfect scream.

All this time Tweedledee was trying his best to fold up the umbrella, with himself in it: which was such an extraordinary thing to do, that it quite took off Alice's attention from the angry brother. But he couldn't quite succeed, and it ended in his rolling over, bundling up in the umbrella, with only his head out: and there he lay, opening and shutting his mouth and his large eyes—'looking more like a fish than anything else,' Alice thought. 'Of course you agree to have a battle?' Tweedledum said in a calmer tone.

'I suppose so,' the other sulkily replied, as he crawled out of the umbrella: 'only she must help us to dress up, you know.' So the two brothers went off hand-in-hand into the wood, and returned in a minute with their arms full of things—such as bolsters, blankets, hearth-rugs, table-cloths, dish-covers, and coal-scuttles. 'I hope you're a good hand at pinning and tying strings?' Tweedledum remarked.

'Every one of these things has got to go on, somehow or other.' Alice said afterwards she had never seen such a fuss made about anything in all her life—the way those two bustled about—and the quantity of things they put on—and the trouble they gave her in tying strings and fastening buttons—'Really they'll be more like bundles of old clothes than anything else, by the time they're ready!' she said to herself, as she arranged a bolster round the neck of Tweedledee, 'to keep his head from being cut off,' as he said. 'You know,' he added very gravely, 'it's one of the most serious things that can possibly happen to one in a battle—to get one's head cut off.' Alice laughed loud: but she managed to turn it into a cough, for fear of hurting his feelings.

'Do I look very pale?' said Tweedledum, coming up to have his helmet tied on. (He called it a helmet, though it certainly looked much more like a saucepan.)

'Well—yes—a little ,' Alice replied gently. 'I'm very brave, generally,' he went on in a low voice: 'only to-day I happen to have a headache.' 'And I've got a toothache!' said Tweedledee, who had overheard the remark. 'I'm far worse than you!' 'Then you'd better not fight to-day,' said Alice, thinking it a good opportunity to make peace. 'We must have a bit of a fight, but I don't care about going on long,' said Tweedledum. 'What's the time now?' Tweedledee looked at his watch, and said 'Half-past four.' 'Let's fight till six, and then have dinner,' said Tweedledum. 'Very well,' the other said, rather sadly: 'and she can watch us—only you'd better not come very close,' he added: 'I generally hit every thing I can see—when I get really excited.' 'And I hit everything within reach,' cried Tweedledum, 'whether I can see it or not!' Alice laughed. 'You must hit the trees pretty often, I should think,' she said. Tweedledum looked round him with a satisfied smile. 'I don't suppose,' he said, 'there'll be a tree left standing, for ever so far round, by the time we've finished!' 'And all about a rattle!' said Alice, still hoping to make them a little ashamed of fighting for such a trifle.

'I shouldn't have minded it so much,' said Tweedledum, 'if it hadn't been a new one.' 'I wish the monstrous crow would come!' thought Alice.

'There's only one sword, you know,' Tweedledum said to his brother: 'but you can have the umbrella — it's quite as sharp. Only we must begin quick. It's getting as dark as it can.' 'And darker,' said Tweedledee. It was getting dark so suddenly that Alice thought there must be a thunderstorm coming on. 'What a thick black cloud that is!' she said.

'And how fast it comes! Why, I do believe it's got wings!' 'It's the crow!' Tweedledum cried out in a shrill voice of alarm; and the two brothers took to their heels and were out of sight in a moment.

Alice ran a little way into the wood, and stopped under a large tree. 'It can never get at me here ,' she thought: 'it's far too large to squeeze itself in among the trees. But I wish it wouldn't flap its wings so — it makes quite a hurricane in the wood — here's somebody's shawl being blown away!'


Chapter 4. Tweedledum And Tweedledee Розділ 4. Твідлдум і Твідлді

Chapter 4. Tweedledum And Tweedledee

THEY were standing under a tree, each with an arm round the other's neck, and Alice knew which was which in a moment, because one of them had "DUM" embroidered on his collar, and the other "DEE". Вони стояли під деревом, кожен з них обіймав іншого за шию, і Аліса одразу зрозуміла, хто з них хто, бо в одного на комірі було вишито "ДУМ", а в іншого - "ОЛЕНЬ". 'I suppose they've each got "TWEEDLE" round at the back of the collar,' she said to herself. They stood so still that she quite forgot they were alive, and she was just going round to see if the word "TWEEDLE" was written at the back of each collar, when she was startled by a voice coming from the one marked "DUM". Вони стояли так нерухомо, що вона зовсім забула про те, що вони живі, і саме обходила їх, щоб подивитися, чи написано слово "TWEEDLE" ззаду на кожному комірці, коли її злякав голос, що доносився з того, на якому було написано "DUM". 'If you think we're wax-works,' he said, 'you ought to pay, you know. "Якщо ви думаєте, що ми воскова фігура, - сказав він, - то вам доведеться заплатити". Wax-works weren't made to be looked at for nothing. Nohow.' Не може бути. 'Contrariwise,' added the one marked "DEE", 'if you think we're alive, you ought to speak.' "І навпаки, - додав той, що був позначений "DEE", - якщо ти думаєш, що ми живі, ти повинен говорити". 'I'm sure I'm very sorry,' was all Alice could say; for the words of the old song kept ringing through her head like the ticking of a clock, and she could hardly help saying them out loud: "Я впевнена, що мені дуже шкода", - це все, що змогла сказати Аліса, бо слова старої пісні продовжували звучати в її голові, як цокання годинника, і вона ледве стримувалася, щоб не вимовити їх вголос: Tweedledum and Tweedledee Agreed to have a battle! Твідлдум і Твідлді домовилися про битву! For Tweedledum said Tweedledee Had spoiled his nice new rattle . Бо Твідлдум сказав, що Твідлді зіпсував його гарне нове брязкальце. Just then flew down a monstrous crow , As black as a tar-barrel ! Аж тут злетіла жахлива ворона, чорна, як бочка з-під дьогтю! Which frightened both the heroes so , They quite forgot their quarrel .' Що так налякало обох героїв, що вони зовсім забули про свою сварку". 'I know what you're thinking about,' said Tweedledum; 'but it isn't so, nohow.' "Я знаю, про що ти думаєш, - сказав Твідледум, - але це не так, ні в якому разі". 'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. "І навпаки, - продовжував Твідлді, - якби це було так, то могло б бути; і якби це було так, то було б; але оскільки це не так, то не так. That's logic.' 'I was thinking,' Alice said politely, 'which is the best way out of this wood: it's getting so dark. Я тут подумала, - ввічливо сказала Аліса, - як краще вийти з цього лісу, бо вже зовсім стемніло. Would you tell me, please?' But the fat little men only looked at each other and grinned. Але товстенькі чоловічки лише переглянулися і посміхнулися.

They looked so exactly like a couple of great schoolboys, that Alice couldn't help pointing her finger at Tweedledum, and saying 'First Boy!' Вони виглядали так схоже на пару чудових школярів, що Аліса не могла не вказати пальцем на Твідледама і не сказати: "Перший хлопчик!". 'Nohow!' Tweedledum cried out briskly, and shut his mouth up again with a snap. Твідледум жваво вигукнув і знову заткнувся, клацнувши ротом.

'Next Boy!' said Alice, passing on to Tweedledee, though she felt quite certain he would only shout out 'Contrariwise!' сказала Аліса, звертаючись до Твідлі, хоча була майже впевнена, що він лише вигукне "Навпаки!". and so he did.

'You've begun wrong!' "Ви почали неправильно! cried Tweedledum. 'The first thing in a visit is to say "How d'ye do?" "Перше, що потрібно зробити під час візиту, це сказати: "Як справи?". and shake hands!' And here the two brothers gave each other a hug, and then they held out the two hands that were free, to shake hands with her. І тут два брати обнялися, а потім простягнули дві руки, які були вільні, щоб потиснути їй руку.

Alice did not like shaking hands with either of them first, for fear of hurting the other one's feelings; so, as the best way out of the difficulty, she took hold of both hands at once: the next moment they were dancing round in a ring. Аліса не любила потискати руку жодному з них першою, боячись образити почуття іншого; тому, як найкращий вихід із ситуації, вона взяла обидві руки відразу: наступної миті вони вже танцювали в хороводі. This seemed quite natural (she remembered afterwards), and she was not even surprised to hear music playing: it seemed to come from the tree under which they were dancing, and it was done (as well as she could make it out) by the branches rubbing one across the other, like fiddles and fiddle-sticks. Це здавалося цілком природним (вона згадувала про це пізніше), і вона навіть не здивувалася, коли почула музику: здавалося, вона долинала з дерева, під яким вони танцювали, і звучала (наскільки вона змогла розібрати) від того, що гілки терлися одна об одну, наче скрипки та палички.

'But it certainly was funny,' (Alice said afterwards, when she was telling her sister the history of all this), 'to find myself singing " Here we go round the mulberry bush. " "Але це, безумовно, було кумедно, - сказала Аліса згодом, розповідаючи сестрі історію всього цього, - виявити, що я співаю "Ось ми йдемо навколо куща шовковиці". " I don't know when I began it, but somehow I felt as if I'd been singing it a long long time!' Не знаю, коли я почав її співати, але якось так сталося, що я відчув, ніби співаю її вже дуже, дуже давно! The other two dancers were fat, and very soon out of breath. Двоє інших танцюристів були товстими і дуже скоро задихалися. 'Four times round is enough for one dance,' Tweedledum panted out, and they left off dancing as suddenly as they had begun: the music stopped at the same moment. Чотири рази по колу - достатньо для одного танцю, - вигукнув Твідледум, і вони припинили танцювати так само раптово, як і почали: музика зупинилася в ту ж мить. Then they let go of Alice's hands, and stood looking at her for a minute: there was a rather awkward pause, as Alice didn't know how to begin a conversation with people she had just been dancing with. Потім вони відпустили руки Аліси і хвилину стояли, дивлячись на неї: виникла досить незручна пауза, оскільки Аліса не знала, як почати розмову з людьми, з якими вона щойно танцювала. 'It would never do to say "How d'ye do?" "Ніколи не варто казати "Як справи?". now ,' she said to herself: 'we seem to have got beyond that, somehow!' Теперь, - сказала она себе, - мы, кажется, вышли за рамки этого! "Тепер, - сказала вона собі, - ми, здається, якось переступили через це! 'I hope you're not much tired?' she said at last.

'Nohow. And thank you very much for asking,' said Tweedledum. 'So much obliged!' added Tweedledee. 'You like poetry?' 'Ye-es, pretty well— some poetry,' Alice said doubtfully. "Так-так, досить непогані вірші", - з сумнівом сказала Аліса. 'Would you tell me which road leads out of the wood?' 'What shall I repeat to her?' "Що мені їй повторити? said Tweedledee, looking round at Tweedledum with great solemn eyes, and not noticing Alice's question. '" The Walrus and the Carpenter " is the longest,' Tweedledum replied, giving his brother an affectionate hug. '" "Морж і тесля" - найдовша", - відповів Твідледум, ніжно обіймаючи брата. Tweedledee began instantly:

' The sun was shining —' Here Alice ventured to interrupt him. 'If it's very long,' she said, as politely as she could, 'would you please tell me first which road—' "Якщо це дуже довго, - сказала вона так ввічливо, як тільки могла, - чи не могли б ви спочатку сказати мені, якою дорогою... Tweedledee smiled gently, and began again:

'The sun was shining on the sea , Shining with all his might : He did his very best to make The billows smooth and bright — And this was odd, because it was The middle of the night . "Сонце світило на море, світило з усієї сили: воно робило все можливе, щоб зробити хвилі рівними і яскравими - і це було дивно, тому що була середина ночі. The moon was shining sulkily , Because she thought the sun Had got no business to be there After the day was done — "It's very rude of him", she said , "To come and spoil the fun !" Місяць світив похмуро, бо вважав, що сонцю нема чого тут робити Після того, як день закінчився - "Це дуже грубо з його боку", - сказала вона, - "Прийти і зіпсувати веселощі!" The sea was wet as wet could be , The sands were dry as dry . Море було мокрим, наскільки мокрим може бути море, піски були сухими, наскільки сухими можуть бути піски. You could not see a cloud, because No cloud was in the sky : No birds were flying overhead — There were no birds to fly . Не було видно ні хмаринки, бо на небі не було хмаринки: Не було пташок, що пролітали над головою - Не було пташок, щоб літати. The Walrus and the Carpenter Were walking close at hand : They wept like anything to see Such quantities of sand : "If this were only cleared away ," They said, "it would be grand !" Морж і Тесля йшли поруч: вони плакали, як ніхто інший, побачивши таку кількість піску: "Якби це все розчистити, - сказали вони, - було б чудово!" "If seven maids with seven mops Swept it for half a year , Do you suppose," the Walrus said , "That they could get it clear?" "Якби сім покоївок з сімома швабрами підмітали його півроку, як ти думаєш, - запитав Морж, - чи змогли б вони його очистити?" "I doubt it," said the Carpenter , And shed a bitter tear . "Я сомневаюсь в этом", - сказал плотник и пролил горькую слезу. "Сумніваюся", - сказав Тесля і пустив гірку сльозу. "O Oysters, come and walk with us!" "О, устриці, ходіть з нами!" The Walrus did beseech . "A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk , Along the briny beach : We cannot do with more than four , To give a hand to each." "Приємна прогулянка, приємна розмова, вздовж солоного пляжу: ми не можемо обійтися більше, ніж вчотирьох, щоб подати руку кожному". The eldest Oyster looked at him , But never a word he said : The eldest Oyster winked his eye , And shook his heavy head — Meaning to say he did not choose To leave the oyster-bed . Старша Устриця подивилась на нього, але жодного слова не сказала: Найстарша Устриця підморгнула оком і похитала важкою головою - це означало, що вона не вирішила покинути устричне ложе. But four young Oysters hurried up , All eager for the treat : Their coats were brushed, their faces washed , Their shoes were clean and neat — And this was odd, because, you know , They hadn't any feet . Але чотири молоденькі Устриці поспішали, Всі прагнули ласощів: Їх шерсть була розчесана, обличчя вмиті, Взуття чисте і акуратне - І це було дивно, бо, знаєте, у них не було ніг. Four other Oysters followed them , And yet another four ; And thick and fast they came at last , And more, and more, and more — All hopping through the frothy waves , And scrambling to the shore . За ними пішли ще чотири Устриці, і ще чотири; І густо і швидко вони припливли нарешті, І ще, і ще, і ще, і ще - Все стрибали через пінисті хвилі, І дряпалися до берега. The Walrus and the Carpenter Walked on a mile or so , And then they rested on a rock Conveniently low : And all the little Oysters stood And waited in a row . Морж і Тесля пройшли з милю або близько того, А потім вони відпочили на скелі Зручно низько: А всі маленькі устриці стояли і чекали в ряд. "The time has come," the Walrus said , "To talk of many things : Of shoes—and ships—and sealing wax — Of cabbages—and kings — And why the sea is boiling hot — And whether pigs have wings." "Настав час, - сказав Морж, - поговорити про багато речей: Про взуття, кораблі та сургуч, про капусту та королів, про те, чому море кипить, і про те, чи є у свиней крила". "But wait a bit," the Oysters cried , "Before we have our chat ; For some of us are out of breath , And all of us are fat!" "Але зачекайте трохи, - кричали устриці, - перш ніж ми поговоримо, бо дехто з нас задихається, і всі ми товсті!" "No hurry!" said the Carpenter . They thanked him much for that . "A loaf of bread," the Walrus said , "Is what we chiefly need : Pepper and vinegar besides Are very good indeed — Now, if you're ready, Oysters dear , We can begin to feed." "Буханець хліба, - сказав морж, - це те, що нам найбільше потрібно: Перець і оцет до того ж дуже гарні - Тепер, якщо ви готові, Устриці дорогі, ми можемо почати годувати". "But not on us!" "Але не на нас!" the Oysters cried , Turning a little blue . Устриці плакали, трохи посиніли. "After such kindness, that would be A dismal thing to do!" "Після такої доброти це було б просто жахливо!" "The night is fine," the Walrus said . "Ніч чудова", - сказав Морж. "Do you admire the view ? "Ти захоплюєшся краєвидом? "It was so kind of you to come ! "Це було так люб'язно з вашого боку, що ви прийшли! And you are very nice!" І ти дуже мила!" The Carpenter said nothing but "Cut us another slice . Тесля нічого не сказав, окрім: "Відріж нам ще один шматок. I wish you were not quite so deaf — I've had to ask you twice!" Хотілося б, щоб ти не був таким глухим - мені довелося просити тебе двічі!" "It seems a shame," the Walrus said , "To play them such a trick . "Мені здається, що це соромно, - сказав Морж, - зіграти з ними такий жарт". After we've brought them out so far , And made them trot so quick!" Після того, як ми вивели їх так далеко, і змусили їх бігти так швидко!" The Carpenter said nothing but "The butter's spread too thick!" Тесля нічого не сказав, окрім: "Масло намазане надто товстим шаром!" "I weep for you," the Walrus said: "I deeply sympathise." "Я плачу за тобою", - сказав морж: "Я глибоко співчуваю." With sobs and tears he sorted out Those of the largest size , Holding his pocket-handkerchief Before his streaming eyes . Зі схлипами і сльозами він перебирав ті, що були найбільшого розміру, тримаючи кишенькову хустинку перед затуманеними очима. "O Oysters," said the Carpenter , "You've had a pleasant run ! "О, устриці, - сказав Тесляр, - у вас була приємна подорож! Shall we be trotting home again?" Може, знову поскачемо додому?" But answer came there none — And this was scarcely odd, because They'd eaten every one.' Але відповіді не прийшло - і це було не дивно, бо вони з'їли все". 'I like the Walrus best,' said Alice: 'because he was a little sorry for the poor oysters.' "Морж мені подобається найбільше, - сказала Аліса, - тому що йому було трохи шкода бідолашних устриць". 'He ate more than the Carpenter, though,' said Tweedledee. "Він з'їв більше, ніж Тесля", - сказав Твідлді. 'You see he held his handkerchief in front, so that the Carpenter couldn't count how many he took: contrariwise.' "Бачите, він тримав хустинку спереду, щоб Тесля не міг порахувати, скільки він взяв: навпаки". 'That was mean!' Alice said indignantly. 'Then I like the Carpenter best—if he didn't eat so many as the Walrus.' "Тоді мені найбільше подобається Тесля, якби він не з'їв так багато, як Морж". 'But he ate as many as he could get,' said Tweedledum. This was a puzzler. Це була головоломка. After a pause, Alice began, 'Well! They were both very unpleasant characters—' Here she checked herself in some alarm, at hearing something that sounded to her like the puffing of a large steam-engine in the wood near them, though she feared it was more likely to be a wild beast. Вони обидва були дуже неприємними персонажами..." Тут вона відчула деяку тривогу, почувши щось, що здалося їй схожим на пихтіння великого парового двигуна в лісі неподалік від них, хоча вона побоювалася, що це, швидше за все, був дикий звір. 'Are there any lions or tigers about here?' she asked timidly.

'It's only the Red King snoring,' said Tweedledee. 'Come and look at him!' the brothers cried, and they each took one of Alice's hands, and led her up to where the King was sleeping. 'Isn't he a lovely sight?' "Хіба він не милий? said Tweedledum.

Alice couldn't say honestly that he was. He had a tall red night-cap on, with a tassel, and he was lying crumpled up into a sort of untidy heap, and snoring loud— 'fit to snore his head off!' На ньому був високий червоний нічний ковпак з китицею, він лежав, зім'ятий у якусь неохайну купу, і голосно хропів - "так, що аж голова тріщала! as Tweedledum remarked.

'I'm afraid he'll catch cold with lying on the damp grass,' said Alice, who was a very thoughtful little girl. 'He's dreaming now,' said Tweedledee: 'and what do you think he's dreaming about?' Alice said 'Nobody can guess that.' 'Why, about you !' "А, про тебе! Tweedledee exclaimed, clapping his hands triumphantly. вигукнув Твідлді, переможно плескаючи в долоні. 'And if he left off dreaming about you, where do you suppose you'd be?' "А якби він перестав мріяти про тебе, де б ти була? 'Where I am now, of course,' said Alice. 'Not you!' Tweedledee retorted contemptuously. 'You'd be nowhere. Why, you're only a sort of thing in his dream!' Та ти ж лише якась річ у його сні! 'If that there King was to wake,' added Tweedledum, 'you'd go out— bang!—just like a candle!' "Якби той король прокинувся, - додав Твідледум, - ти б згас - бац! - просто як свічка! 'I shouldn't!' Alice exclaimed indignantly. 'Besides, if I'm only a sort of thing in his dream, what are you , I should like to know?' "До того ж, якщо я лише якась річ у його сні, то хто ж ти, я хотів би знати? 'Ditto,' said Tweedledum. 'Ditto, ditto!' cried Tweedledee.

He shouted this so loud that Alice couldn't help saying 'Hush! Він вигукнув це так голосно, що Аліса не втрималася і сказала: "Тихіше!". You'll be waking him, I'm afraid, if you make so much noise.' Боюся, ти його розбудиш, якщо будеш так шуміти". 'Well, it's no use your talking about waking him,' said Tweedledum, 'when you're only one of the things in his dream. Що ж, марно говорити про те, щоб розбудити його, - сказав Твідледум, - коли ти - лише одна з речей у його сні. You know very well you're not real.' 'I am real!' said Alice, and began to cry.

'You won't make yourself a bit realer by crying,' Tweedledee remarked: 'there's nothing to cry about.' "Ти не зробиш себе хоч трохи реальнішим, плачучи, - зауважив Твідлді, - тут нема про що плакати". 'If I wasn't real,' Alice said—half laughing through her tears, it all seemed so ridiculous—'I shouldn't be able to cry.' "Якби я була несправжньою, - сказала Аліса, напівсміючись крізь сльози, все це здавалося таким смішним, - я б не могла плакати". 'I hope you don't suppose those are real tears?' "Сподіваюся, ти не думаєш, що це справжні сльози? Tweedledum interrupted in a tone of great contempt. Твідледум перебив його тоном великого презирства.

'I know they're talking nonsense,' Alice thought to herself: 'and it's foolish to cry about it.' "Я знаю, що вони говорять нісенітниці, - подумала Аліса, - і нерозумно плакати через це". So she brushed away her tears, and went on, as cheerfully as she could, 'At any rate, I'd better be getting out of the wood, for really it's coming on very dark. Вона змахнула сльози і продовжила так бадьоро, як тільки могла: "У всякому разі, мені краще вийти з лісу, бо вже зовсім стемніло. Do you think it's going to rain?' Tweedledum spread a large umbrella over himself and his brother, and looked up into it. Твідледум накрив себе і брата великою парасолькою і подивився в неї вгору. 'No, I don't think it is,' he said: 'at least—not under here . "Ні, я не думаю, що це так, - сказав він, - принаймні, не тут. Nohow.' 'But it may rain outside ?' 'It may—if it chooses,' said Tweedledee: 'we've no objection. "Може, якщо захоче", - сказав Твідлді, - "ми не заперечуємо". Contrariwise.' 'Selfish things!' "Егоїстичні речі! thought Alice, and she was just going to say 'Good-night' and leave them, when Tweedledum sprang out from under the umbrella, and seized her by the wrist. подумала Аліса і вже хотіла побажати їм на добраніч і піти, коли з-під парасольки вискочив Твідлдум і схопив її за зап'ясток. 'Do you see that ?' he said, in a voice choking with passion, and his eyes grew large and yellow all in a moment, as he pointed with a trembling finger at a small white thing lying under the tree. сказал он задыхающимся от страсти голосом, и глаза его вмиг стали большими и желтыми, когда он дрожащим пальцем указал на маленькую белую вещицу, лежащую под деревом. сказав він, задихаючись від пристрасті, і його очі вмить стали великими і жовтими, коли він тремтячим пальцем вказав на маленьку білу річ, що лежала під деревом.

'It's only a rattle,' Alice said, after a careful examination of the little white thing. "Це лише брязкальце", - сказала Аліса, уважно оглянувши маленьку білу річ. 'Not a rattle- snake , you know,' she added hastily, thinking that he was frightened: 'only an old rattle—quite old and broken.' "Не брязкальце-змія, знаєш, - поспішно додала вона, подумавши, що він злякався, - лише старе брязкальце - досить старе і зламане". 'I knew it was!' cried Tweedledum, beginning to stamp about wildly and tear his hair. закричав Твідледум, почавши дико тупотіти і рвати на собі волосся. 'It's spoilt, of course!' "Звісно, вона зіпсована! Here he looked at Tweedledee, who immediately sat down on the ground, and tried to hide himself under the umbrella. Тут він подивився на Твідлі, який одразу ж сів на землю і спробував сховатися під парасолькою.

Alice laid her hand upon his arm and said, in a soothing tone, 'You needn't be so angry about an old rattle.' Аліса поклала йому руку на руку і сказала заспокійливим тоном: "Не треба так сердитися через стару брязкальце". 'But it isn't old!' Tweedledum cried, in a greater fury than ever. 'It's new , I tell you—I bought it yesterday—my nice NEW RATTLE!' and his voice rose to a perfect scream.

All this time Tweedledee was trying his best to fold up the umbrella, with himself in it: which was such an extraordinary thing to do, that it quite took off Alice's attention from the angry brother. Весь цей час Твідлді щосили намагався скласти парасольку, накривши її собою: це було настільки неординарним вчинком, що повністю відволікло увагу Аліси від розгніваного брата. But he couldn't quite succeed, and it ended in his rolling over, bundling up in the umbrella, with only his head out: and there he lay, opening and shutting his mouth and his large eyes—'looking more like a fish than anything else,' Alice thought. Але йому це не вдалося, і все закінчилося тим, що він перевернувся, загорнувся в парасольку, висунувши лише голову: так він і лежав, відкриваючи і закриваючи рот і великі очі - "більше схожий на рибу, ніж на що-небудь інше", - подумала Аліса. 'Of course you agree to have a battle?' "Звісно, ти згоден на бій? Tweedledum said in a calmer tone.

'I suppose so,' the other sulkily replied, as he crawled out of the umbrella: 'only she must help us to dress up, you know.' "Мабуть, так", - похмуро відповів інший, вилазячи з-під парасольки, - "тільки вона повинна допомогти нам одягнутися, знаєш". So the two brothers went off hand-in-hand into the wood, and returned in a minute with their arms full of things—such as bolsters, blankets, hearth-rugs, table-cloths, dish-covers, and coal-scuttles. Тож брати, взявшись за руки, пішли до лісу, а за хвилину повернулися з повними руками речей - подушок, ковдр, припічків, скатертин, кришок для посуду та вугільних мішків. 'I hope you're a good hand at pinning and tying strings?' "Сподіваюся, ти добре вмієш приколювати та зав'язувати шнурки? Tweedledum remarked.

'Every one of these things has got to go on, somehow or other.' "Кожна з цих речей має продовжуватися, так чи інакше". Alice said afterwards she had never seen such a fuss made about anything in all her life—the way those two bustled about—and the quantity of things they put on—and the trouble they gave her in tying strings and fastening buttons—'Really they'll be more like bundles of old clothes than anything else, by the time they're ready!' Аліса потім сказала, що ніколи в житті не бачила такої метушні - як ці двоє метушилися, скільки речей вони одягали, скільки клопоту завдавали їй, зав'язуючи шнурки та застібаючи ґудзики - "Насправді, коли вони будуть готові, вони будуть більше схожі на стоси старого одягу, ніж на щось інше! she said to herself, as she arranged a bolster round the neck of Tweedledee, 'to keep his head from being cut off,' as he said. сказала она себе, устраивая на шее Твидлди подпорку, чтобы ему не отрубили голову, как он сказал. сказала вона собі, обмотуючи шию Твідлді підставкою, - "щоб йому не відрізали голову", як він сказав. 'You know,' he added very gravely, 'it's one of the most serious things that can possibly happen to one in a battle—to get one's head cut off.' Alice laughed loud: but she managed to turn it into a cough, for fear of hurting his feelings. Аліса голосно розсміялася: але їй вдалося перетворити сміх на кашель, боячись образити його почуття.

'Do I look very pale?' said Tweedledum, coming up to have his helmet tied on. сказав Твідледум, підходячи, щоб зав'язати шолом. (He called it a helmet, though it certainly looked much more like a saucepan.) (Він називав це шоломом, хоча насправді це було більше схоже на каструлю).

'Well—yes—a little ,' Alice replied gently. 'I'm very brave, generally,' he went on in a low voice: 'only to-day I happen to have a headache.' 'And I've got a toothache!' said Tweedledee, who had overheard the remark. 'I'm far worse than you!' 'Then you'd better not fight to-day,' said Alice, thinking it a good opportunity to make peace. 'We must have a bit of a fight, but I don't care about going on long,' said Tweedledum. "Нам доведеться трохи побитися, але я не хочу, щоб це тривало довго", - сказав Твідледум. 'What's the time now?' Tweedledee looked at his watch, and said 'Half-past four.' 'Let's fight till six, and then have dinner,' said Tweedledum. 'Very well,' the other said, rather sadly: 'and she can watch us—only you'd better not come very close,' he added: 'I generally hit every thing I can see—when I get really excited.' "Дуже добре", - сказав інший, досить сумно, - "і вона може спостерігати за нами - тільки тобі краще не підходити дуже близько", - додав він, - "я зазвичай б'ю все, що бачу - коли дуже збуджений". 'And I hit everything within reach,' cried Tweedledum, 'whether I can see it or not!' "І я влучив у все, що було в межах досяжності, - вигукнув Твідледум, - незалежно від того, бачу я це чи ні! Alice laughed. 'You must hit the trees pretty often, I should think,' she said. Tweedledum looked round him with a satisfied smile. Твідледум із задоволеною посмішкою озирнувся навколо. 'I don't suppose,' he said, 'there'll be a tree left standing, for ever so far round, by the time we've finished!' "Не думаю, - сказав він, - що до того часу, як ми закінчимо, від дерева залишиться хоч одне дерево, що стоятиме вічно! 'And all about a rattle!' said Alice, still hoping to make them a little ashamed of fighting for such a trifle.

'I shouldn't have minded it so much,' said Tweedledum, 'if it hadn't been a new one.' "Я б не звертав на це уваги, - сказав Твідледум, - якби воно не було новим". 'I wish the monstrous crow would come!' "Я хочу, щоб прилетіла жахлива ворона! thought Alice.

'There's only one sword, you know,' Tweedledum said to his brother: 'but you can have the umbrella — it's quite as sharp. "Знаєш, у нас є лише один меч, - сказав Твідледум братові, - але ти можеш взяти парасольку - вона така ж гостра". Only we must begin quick. It's getting as dark as it can.' 'And darker,' said Tweedledee. It was getting dark so suddenly that Alice thought there must be a thunderstorm coming on. Темніло так несподівано, що Аліса подумала, що, мабуть, насувається гроза. 'What a thick black cloud that is!' "Яка це густа чорна хмара! she said.

'And how fast it comes! Why, I do believe it's got wings!' Чому, я вірю, що у нього є крила! 'It's the crow!' Tweedledum cried out in a shrill voice of alarm; and the two brothers took to their heels and were out of sight in a moment. Твідледум закричав пронизливим голосом тривоги; обидва брати схопилися на ноги і за мить зникли з поля зору.

Alice ran a little way into the wood, and stopped under a large tree. 'It can never get at me here ,' she thought: 'it's far too large to squeeze itself in among the trees. "Він ніколи не зможе дістатися до мене тут, - думала вона, - він занадто великий, щоб протиснутися між деревами". But I wish it wouldn't flap its wings so — it makes quite a hurricane in the wood — here's somebody's shawl being blown away!' Але я б хотіла, щоб він так не махав крилами, а то в лісі здіймається такий ураган - ось чиюсь хустку здуває!".