'The Troupe of Ten' | Ep. 163 (1)

NARRATOR: There once was a troupe of actors. Ten talented performers, young and old, who traveled the country, putting on show after show – making their audiences laugh and cry and think.

The actors believed theater should be available to everyone, whether they were as rich as a lord or poor as a church mouse. So they didn't charge a cent for their shows; instead, they put on every performance for free!

But as a result, the actors didn't have much money themselves. So everywhere they went, they relied on the kindness of strangers. And most of the time, the troupe was greeted with open arms.

[SOT: knock, door opens]

ACTOR 2: Greetings, sir!

ACTOR 3: Now that we're done performing for the day…

ACTOR 4: …might you share a morsel with some hungry actors?

KIND MAN: Oh I can do more than ‘share a morsel'! I can offer you a meal! Please – join me and my family for dinner!

[SOT: knock, door opens]

ACTOR 5: Good evening, ma'am!

ACTOR 6: We couldn't help but notice this beautiful inn of yours.

ACTOR 7: Might you spare a bed or two for the night?

KIND WOMAN: I can spare plenty of beds for a talented troupe like yours! Come in! Come in!

NARRATOR: But there was one place where the troupe of ten received anything but a warm welcome.

[SOT: knock on large door, large door opens]

ACTOR 8: Greetings!

ACTOR 9: It's awfully hot out and we performers are parched!

ACTOR 10: Could you kindly share some cold water with a humble group of –

[SOT: large door slam]

NARRATOR: And I am sorry to say that this one place… was the royal palace. Home of the King and Queen.

You see, while everyone else in the country loved how the actors entertained them, making them laugh and cry and think, the King and Queen did not.

KING: My dear Queen! Can you believe that ragamuffin troupe of actors had the nerve to knock at our palace door yet again?!? ?

QUEEN: Who do those clowns think they are, anyway?!? Prancing about in cities, towns, and villages and telling their little stories?! ?

KING: And trying to make us laugh?! ?

QUEEN: And cry?! ?

KING: And think?! ?

QUEEN: And then they expect us to help support them?

KING: We must do something to tarnish this troupe's good name!

QUEEN: And show our people what good-for-nothing free-loaders these actors truly are!

NARRATOR: So the King and Queen tried coming up with a plan. They considered one option…

KING: How about…!?!? (pause) Nah. Forget it.

NARRATOR: …then another…

QUEEN: Oh, I know! What if we…? (pause) Nah. Scratch that.

NARRATOR: Until finally…

KING: / QUEEN: A-HA! !

NARRATOR: …they cooked up a scheme they were certain would work.

They began by summoning the royal chefs.

KING: Chefs, we want you to cook up a big breakfast – enough eggs, pancakes, porridge and tea for at least ten people!

QUEEN: Then set it up outside, in the marble courtyard in front of the palace!

NARRATOR: Next, the King and Queen summoned the royal treasurers.

KING: Treasurers, we want you to collect a big bag of gold coins from the royal treasury!

QUEEN: Then take the coins and scatter them all over the marble courtyard in front of the palace!

NARRATOR: Finally, they summoned the royal messengers.

KING: Messengers, we want you to send an invitation to every member of the traveling acting troupe.

QUEEN: Tell them they're invited to breakfast in the marble courtyard in front of the palace, tomorrow!

NARRATOR: The royal chefs, treasurers and messengers got right down to work, cooking food, gathering coins, and delivering invitations.

And as the king and queen went to bed that night, and thought about their brilliant scheme, they couldn't help… but smile.

[theme music in]

NARRATOR: What “brilliant scheme” do you think the king and queen are cooking up?

And what will become of the troupe of ten actors?

We'll find out, after a quick break.

[theme music out]

[BREAK]

[theme music in]

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Circle Round. I'm Rebecca Sheir. Today our story is called “The Troupe of Ten.”

[theme music out]

NARRATOR: Before the break, the King and Queen were hatching a plot to ruin the good name of a traveling acting troupe. So they invited the ten performers to breakfast in the courtyard in front of the palace.

When the actors received the invitation…

ACTOR 2: Breakfast…! ?

ACTOR 3: …in the palace courtyard?! ?

NARRATOR: …they could hardly believe it!

ACTOR 4: But the King and Queen despise us!

ACTOR 5: They think we're the worst!

ACTOR 6: Every time we knock on their door…

ACTOR 7: …they slam it in our face!

ACTOR 8: (thinking about it, hopeful) But maybe…

ACTOR 9: (thinking about it, hopeful) …if they're inviting us to breakfast…

ACTOR 10: (thinking about it, hopeful) …they've changed their minds!

TROUPE LEADER: Or maybe not!

NARRATOR: The leader of the acting troupe couldn't help but feel skeptical.

TROUPE LEADER: Ya know, I can't help but feel skeptical! After the cold shoulder the King and Queen have given us all these years, I trust them as far as I can throw them. And even though I work out, I doubt I can throw them very far. (beat) So listen. You know what an early riser I am. Tomorrow, I will wake before sunrise, sneak over to the palace, then see if there's any funny business going on. If there is, I'll make sure we're the ones who have the last laugh!

NARRATOR: Early the next morning, when the troupe leader snuck over to the palace and peered into the courtyard, her eyes widened as she beheld the wide-open space, its gleaming floor made of pure white marble. The whole thing was surrounded by marble columns, and lined with lush plants sprouting from fancy porcelain pots.

But in the middle of the courtyard, the troupe leader spied something that made her eyes grow even wider! The royal treasurers were holding big bags of gold coins, and sprinkling the coins all over the gleaming marble floor!

TREASURER 1: (with a gleeful laugh) Can you believe this plan the King and Queen have cooked up?

TREASURER 2: (with a gleeful laugh) It's brilliant!

TREASURER 1: When those good-for-nothing actors arrive and see all this gold lying on the ground, it's just a matter of time before at least one of them bends down and stuffs their pockets with coins!

TREASURER 2: Then they'll be arrested for stealing! The troupe's reputation will be ruined, and that'll be the end of them!

TREASURER 1: / TREASURER 2: (ad-lib laughter)

NARRATOR: Now that the troupe leader knew what the King and Queen were up to…

TROUPE LEADER: So that's what the King and Queen are up to!

NARRATOR: …she didn't waste a minute.

TROUPE LEADER: I mustn't waste a minute!

NARRATOR: She darted back to where the troupe was staying and rummaged through their costumes, props, and sets until she found what she was looking for.

TROUPE LEADER: A tin of wax. This'll be perfect!

NARRATOR: She shoved the tin of wax in her pocket, then woke everybody up.

TROUPE LEADER: Wake up, everybody! The King and Queen are expecting us for breakfast in just a few minutes! Since time is so short, all I'll say is this. When you get to the palace courtyard, do not pick anything up off the ground! No matter what! In fact, don't even look down, if you can help it. Now let's go!

NARRATOR: The troupe of ten got all ready and bustled over to the palace. When the actors walked into the courtyard, the King and Queen greeted them with big, phony grins.

KING: (with a fake smile) Welcome, dear actors!

QUEEN: (with a fake smile) It's an honor to have you!

KING: Please! Eat all you want!

QUEEN: And enjoy!

NARRATOR: The king and queen kept a watchful eye as the actors ate and drank and mingled. But to the royal couple's surprise, not one of the performers bent down to pick up any gold!

And yet, after breakfast was finished, and the actors said goodbye and left…

KING: What on earth?!? ?

QUEEN: It can't be!! !

NARRATOR: …not one gold coin was left on the ground!

KING: Those sly devils made off with our coins!

QUEEN: Yet we didn't see them do it!

NARRATOR: The King and Queen were determined to catch whichever of the actors stole the gold coins. So they cooked up another scheme.

KING: We'll ask the actors to attend a party in the palace ballroom this evening! With the finest food, the finest drink, and the finest music!

QUEEN: And we'll invite the actors to spend the night! Each in their own spacious room!

KING: We'll tell our guards to stay alert during the festivities, and find out which of the actors stole the gold coins.

QUEEN: Once they discover who's guilty, they won't say a word. Instead, after the party they'll sneak into their room, and draw an ink mark on their left hand while they sleep!

KING: The next morning, you and I will spot the ink mark, seize the culprit…

QUEEN: …and lock them up in jail!

KING: / QUEEN: (ad-lib self-satisfied laughter)

NARRATOR: So the King and Queen sent the troupe another invitation, for a dinner party that very same night.

[SOT: party music]

NARRATOR: Again, the actors were surprised, but they decided why not? We'll go to a dinner party at the palace!

And when they filed into the grand ballroom, the King and Queen greeted them with even bigger, phonier grins than they did that morning in the courtyard.

KING: (with an even faker smile) Greetings, beloved actors!

QUEEN: (with an even faker smile) We're delighted to see you again!

KING: Please! Enjoy the food, drink, and music!

QUEEN: And enjoy your spacious rooms! We are honored to have you as our guests.

[SOT: party hubbub + music]

NARRATOR: The King and Queen posted guards all over the ballroom. And as the guests dined and drank and danced, one of the guards happened to overhear a young actor talking with the troupe leader.

ACTOR 6: All of us actors are dying to know! How did you make off with the gold coins this morning? Can you share your secret?

NARRATOR: The troupe leader gave the boy a smile.

TROUPE LEADER: Well, I probably shouldn't talk about it here, but with all this food, drink, and music, it isn't like anybody's listening. (beat) The secret… was wax!

ACTOR 6: Wax?!? ?

TROUPE LEADER: Yes! I put wax all over the bottom of my shoes! Then, as I walked around the marble courtyard, the coins got stuck to the wax! And the king and queen were none the wiser!

ACTOR 6: That's brilliant!

TROUPE LEADER: It is, isn't it. (beat) But here's the thing. I just wanted to teach the King and Queen a lesson! Remember those big potted plants that were surrounding the courtyard? Before we left, I secretly – [stops short]

NARRATOR: The troupe leader stopped short. For out of the corner of her eye she noticed one of the palace guards giving her a strange look.

The troupe leader was certain she'd been overheard, and that her goose was cooked. Yet for the rest of the party, nothing happened! The guard never said a word!

[SOT: party hubbub/music fades out]

NARRATOR: Later that night, when the food, dance and drink came to an end, the actors retired to their spacious rooms to go to bed. Their mattresses were softer than bags of marshmallows, and one by one…

[SOT: the below will overlap, for a quick montage effect]

ACTOR 2: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

ACTOR 3: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

ACTOR 4: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

NARRATOR: …room by room…

ACTOR 5: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

ACTOR 6: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

ACTOR 7: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

NARRATOR: …all of the actors fell asleep.

ACTOR 8: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

ACTOR 9: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

ACTOR 10: (ad-lib sleep/snore)

NARRATOR: …well, all of the actors except for one: the troupe leader. Even though the guard had left her alone for the rest of the party, she was nervous.