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Queering Identities: LGBTQ+ Sexuality and Gender Identity, 2.03 (V) Sex Does Not Equal Gender

2.03 (V) Sex Does Not Equal Gender

The sex a person is designated at birth is not the same thing as their gender. A person's sex is usually determined by somebody else and is based on their physical genetic and anatomical traits. Gender is different. It's an internal sense of where one falls on the spectrum that gauges how feminine or masculine someone is. No one else can tell us our gender because no one else can see it. Another term, gender expression, is used to describe the process of showing our gender to the world. Everybody makes decisions about their gender expression all the time. For example, the clothes we choose to wear, the way we walk, sit or stand, decisions about how much jewelry or makeup to wear and a lot of other choices are all part of our gender expression. We use the word sex to talk about a person's genetic and biological traits. We use gender identity to talk about a person's internal sense of who they are. We use gender expression to talk about how they express who they are to the world. Most cultures assume there's a very clear and predictable relationship between sex, gender identity and gender expression. If a baby is born with a penis, then the baby is male, then he will become a boy and then a man someday. He will express his masculine gender identity by wearing masculine clothes and doing masculine things. Likewise, if a baby is born with a vagina, then the baby is assumed to be female. She will become a girl and then a woman. She will express her feminine gender identity with traditionally feminine clothes and activities. For many people the sex they were assigned at birth lines up pretty well with their gender identity and gender expression. Those people are cisgender. The word cisgender comes from the Latin root, cis, meaning same. But some people don't feel like their gender identity aligns with that default trajectory. Someone who was assigned female at birth like me might identify as a man, like I do. Another person who was assigned female at birth might identify as genderqueer or non-binary or two-spirit or agender or something else entirely. These cases are examples of people who are transgender. Assuming a baby is cisgender and straight can create expectations about who that baby is going to become as they grow up. By the time the baby starts figuring out their own gender identity and sexuality, they may have internalized a belief that queer and transgender people aren't normal. These beliefs can lead to a fear or hatred toward queer and transgender people. Babies are not only designated as sex and a gender when they're born, but they're also assumed to be heterosexual. That is, a baby who has been designated as male is assumed to be sexually and romantically attracted to girls and women. And a baby who's been designated as female is assumed to be sexually and romantically attracted to boys and men. Our culture makes these assumptions even though there's absolutely no evidence about who a person will be attracted to when they're a baby. This is a good time to talk about the difference between what's, quote, normal and what's common. In general, it's more common for a person to be cisgender than transgender and it's more common for a person to be heterosexual than queer. By the way, it's also a lot more common for a person to have brown eyes than eyes that are any other color. That doesn't make brown eyes normal and other eye colors abnormal. It just makes brown eyes more common and other eye colors less common. We think it would be wonderful to live in a world where queer and transgender identities are viewed as less common, but no less normal than straight and cisgender identities.


2.03 (V) Sex Does Not Equal Gender

The sex a person is designated at birth is not the same thing as their gender. A person's sex is usually determined by somebody else and is based on their physical genetic and anatomical traits. Gender is different. It's an internal sense of where one falls on the spectrum that gauges how feminine or masculine someone is. No one else can tell us our gender because no one else can see it. Another term, gender expression, is used to describe the process of showing our gender to the world. Everybody makes decisions about their gender expression all the time. For example, the clothes we choose to wear, the way we walk, sit or stand, decisions about how much jewelry or makeup to wear and a lot of other choices are all part of our gender expression. We use the word sex to talk about a person's genetic and biological traits. We use gender identity to talk about a person's internal sense of who they are. We use gender expression to talk about how they express who they are to the world. Most cultures assume there's a very clear and predictable relationship between sex, gender identity and gender expression. If a baby is born with a penis, then the baby is male, then he will become a boy and then a man someday. He will express his masculine gender identity by wearing masculine clothes and doing masculine things. Likewise, if a baby is born with a vagina, then the baby is assumed to be female. She will become a girl and then a woman. She will express her feminine gender identity with traditionally feminine clothes and activities. For many people the sex they were assigned at birth lines up pretty well with their gender identity and gender expression. Those people are cisgender. The word cisgender comes from the Latin root, cis, meaning same. But some people don't feel like their gender identity aligns with that default trajectory. Someone who was assigned female at birth like me might identify as a man, like I do. Another person who was assigned female at birth might identify as genderqueer or non-binary or two-spirit or agender or something else entirely. These cases are examples of people who are transgender. Assuming a baby is cisgender and straight can create expectations about who that baby is going to become as they grow up. By the time the baby starts figuring out their own gender identity and sexuality, they may have internalized a belief that queer and transgender people aren't normal. These beliefs can lead to a fear or hatred toward queer and transgender people. Babies are not only designated as sex and a gender when they're born, but they're also assumed to be heterosexual. That is, a baby who has been designated as male is assumed to be sexually and romantically attracted to girls and women. And a baby who's been designated as female is assumed to be sexually and romantically attracted to boys and men. Our culture makes these assumptions even though there's absolutely no evidence about who a person will be attracted to when they're a baby. This is a good time to talk about the difference between what's, quote, normal and what's common. In general, it's more common for a person to be cisgender than transgender and it's more common for a person to be heterosexual than queer. By the way, it's also a lot more common for a person to have brown eyes than eyes that are any other color. That doesn't make brown eyes normal and other eye colors abnormal. It just makes brown eyes more common and other eye colors less common. We think it would be wonderful to live in a world where queer and transgender identities are viewed as less common, but no less normal than straight and cisgender identities.