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City Of Glass - New York Trilogy #1, City of Glass - 03 (2)

City of Glass - 03 (2)

“Peter was a good boy. But it was hard to teach him words. His mouth did not work right. And of course he was not all there in his head. Ba ba ba, he said. And da da da. And wa wa wa. Excuse me. It took more years and years. Now they say to Peter: you can go now, there's nothing more we can do for you. Peter Stillman, you are a human being, they said. It is good to believe what doctors say. Thank you. Thank you so very much.

“I am Peter Stillman. That is not my real name. My real name is Peter Rabbit. In the winter I am Mr. White, in the summer I am Mr. Green. Think what you like of this. I say it of my own free will. Wimble click crumblechaw beloo. It is beautiful, is it not? I make up words like this all the time. That can't be helped. They just come out of my mouth by themselves. They cannot be translated.

“Ask and ask. It does no good. But I will tell you. I don't want you to be sad, Mr. Auster. You have such a kind face. You remind me of a somesuch or a groan, I don't know which. And your eyes look at me. Yes, yes. I can see them. That is very good. Thank you.

“That is why I will tell you. No questions, please. You are wondering about all the rest. That is to say, the father. The terrible father who did all those things to little Peter. Rest assured. They took him to a dark place. They locked him up and left him there. Ha ha ha. Excuse me. Sometimes I am so funny.

“Thirteen years, they said. That is perhaps a long time. But I know nothing of time. I am new every day. I am born when I wake up in the morning, I grow old during the day, and I die at night when I go to sleep. It is not my fault. I am doing so well today. I am doing so much better than I have ever done before.

“For thirteen years the father was away. His name is Peter Stillman too. Strange, is it not? That two people can have the same name? I do not know if that is his real name. But I do not think he is me. We are both Peter Stillman. But Peter Stillman is not my real name. So perhaps I am not Peter Stillman, after all.

“Thirteen years I say. Or they say. It makes no difference. I know nothing of time. But what they tell me is this. Tomorrow is the end of thirteen years. That is bad. Even though they say it is not, it is bad. I am not supposed to remember. But now and then I do, in spite of what I say.

“He will come. That is to say, the father will come. And he will try to kill me. Thank you. But I do not want that. No, no. Not anymore. Peter lives now. Yes. All is not right in his head, but still he lives. And that is something, is it not? You bet your bottom dollar. Ha ha ha.

“I am mostly now a poet. Every day I sit in my room and write another poem. I make up all the words myself, just like when I lived in the dark. I begin to remember things that way, to pretend that I am back in the dark again. I am the only one who knows what the words mean. They cannot be translated. These poems will make me famous. Hit the nail on the head. Ya, ya, ya. Beautiful poems. So beautiful the whole world will weep.

“Later perhaps I will do something else. After I am done being a poet. Sooner or later I will run out of words, you see. Everyone has just so many words inside him. And then where will I be? I think I would like to be a fireman after that. And after that a doctor. It makes no difference. The last thing I will be is a high-wire walker. When I am very old and have at last learned how to walk like other people. Then I will dance on the wire, and people will be amazed. Even little children. That is what I would like. To dance on the wire until I die.

“But no matter. It makes no difference. To me. As you can see, I am a rich man. I do not have to worry. No, no. Not about that. You bet your bottom dollar. The father was rich, and little Peter got all his money after they locked him up in the dark. Ha ha ha. Excuse me for laughing. Sometimes I am so funny.

“I am the last of the Stillmans. That was quite a family, or so they say. From old Boston, in case you might have heard of it. I am the last one. There are no others. I am the end of everyone, the last man. So much the better, I think. It is not a pity that it should all end now. It is good for everyone to be dead.

“The father was perhaps not really bad. At least I say so now. He had a big head. As big as very big, which meant there was too much room in there. So many thoughts in that big head of his. But poor Peter, was he not? And in terrible straits indeed. Peter who could not see or say, who could not think or do. Peter who could not. No. Not anything.

“I know nothing of any of this. Nor do I understand. My wife is the one who tells me these things. She says it is important for me to know, even if I do not understand. But even this I do not understand. In order to know, you must understand. Is that not so? But I know nothing. Perhaps I am Peter Stillman, and perhaps I am not. My real name is Peter Nobody. Thank you. And what do you think of that?

“So I am telling you about the father. It is a good story, even if I do not understand it. I can tell it to you because I know the words. And that is something, is it not? To know the words, I mean. Sometimes I am so proud of myself! Excuse me. This is what my wife says. She says the father talked about God. That is a funny word to me. When you put it backwards, it spells dog. And a dog is not much like God, is it? Woof woof. Bow wow. Those are dog words. I think they are beautiful. So pretty and true. Like the words I make up.

“Anyway. I was saying. The father talked about God. He wanted to know if God had a language. Don't ask me what this means. I am only telling you because I know the words. The father thought a baby might speak it if the baby saw no people. But what baby was there? Ah. Now you begin to see. You did not have to buy him. Of course, Peter knew some people words. That could not be helped. But the father thought maybe Peter would forget them. After a while. That is why there was so much boom, boom, boom. Every time Peter said a word, his father would boom him. At last Peter learned to say nothing. Ya ya ya. Thank you.

“Peter kept the words inside him. All those days and months and years. There in the dark, little Peter all alone, and the words made noise in his head and kept him company. That is why his mouth does not work right. Poor Peter. Boo hoo. Such are his tears. The little boy who can never grow up.

“Peter can talk like people now. But he still has the other words in his head. They are God's language, and no one else can speak them. They cannot be translated. That is why Peter lives so close to God. That is why he is a famous poet.

“Everything is so good for me now. I can do whatever I like. Any time, any place. I even have a wife. You can see that. I mentioned her before. Perhaps you have even met her. She is beautiful, is she not? Her name is Virginia. That is not her real name. But that makes no difference. To me.

“Whenever I ask, my wife gets a girl for me. They are whores. I put my worm inside them and they moan. There have been so many. Ha ha. They come up here and I fuck them. It feels good to fuck. Virginia gives them money and everyone is happy. You bet your bottom dollar. Ha ha.

“Poor Virginia. She does not like to fuck. That is to say, with me. Perhaps she fucks another. Who can say? I know nothing of this. It makes no difference. But maybe if you are nice to Virginia she will let you fuck her. It would make me happy. For your sake. Thank you.

“So. There are a great many things. I am trying to tell them to you. I know that all is not right in my head. And it is true, yes, and I say this of my own free will, that sometimes I just scream and scream. For no good reason. As if there had to be a reason. But for none that I can see. Or anyone else. No. And then there are the times when I say nothing. For days and days on end. Nothing, nothing, nothing. I forget how to make the words come out of my mouth. Then it is hard for me to move. Ya ya. Or even to see. That is when I become Mr. Sad.

“I still like to be in the dark. At least sometimes. It does me good, I think. In the dark I speak God's language and no one can hear me. Do not be angry, please. I cannot help it.

“Best of all, there is the air. Yes. And little by little, I have learned to live inside it. The air and the light, yes, that too, the light that shines on all things and puts them there for my eyes to see. There is the air and the light, and this best of all. Excuse me. The air and the light. Yes. When the weather is good, I like to sit by the open window. Sometimes I look out and watch the things below. The street and all the people, the dogs and cars, the bricks of the building across the way. And then there are the times when I close my eyes and just sit there, with the breeze blowing on my face, and the light inside the air, all around me and just beyond my eyes, and the world all red, a beautiful red inside my eyes, with the sun shining on me and my eyes.

“It is true that I rarely go out. It is hard for me, and I am not always to be trusted. Sometimes I scream. Do not be angry with me, please. I cannot help it. Virginia says I must learn how to behave in public. But sometimes I cannot help myself, and the screams just come out of me.

“But I do love going to the park. There are the trees, and the air and the light. There is good in all that, is there not? Yes. Little by little, I am getting better inside myself. I can feel it. Even Dr. Wyshnegradsky says so. I know that I am still the puppet boy. That cannot be helped. No, no. Anymore. But sometimes I think I will at last grow up and become real.



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City of Glass - 03 (2)

“Peter was a good boy. “Peter era un buen chico. But it was hard to teach him words. Pero era difícil enseñarle palabras. His mouth did not work right. Su boca no funcionaba bien. And of course he was not all there in his head. Y, por supuesto, no estaba todo en su cabeza. Ba ba ba, he said. Ba ba ba, dijo. And da da da. Y pa pa pa. And wa wa wa. Y wa wa wa. Excuse me. Perdóneme. It took more years and years. Tomó más años y años. Now they say to Peter: you can go now, there's nothing more we can do for you. Ahora le dicen a Peter: ya puedes irte, no hay nada más que podamos hacer por ti. Peter Stillman, you are a human being, they said. Peter Stillman, eres un ser humano, dijeron. It is good to believe what doctors say. Es bueno creer lo que dicen los médicos. Thank you. Gracias. Thank you so very much. Muchas gracias.

“I am Peter Stillman. “Soy Peter Stillman. That is not my real name. Ese no es mi verdadero nombre. My real name is Peter Rabbit. Mi verdadero nombre es Peter Rabbit. In the winter I am Mr. White, in the summer I am Mr. Green. En el invierno soy el Sr. Blanco, en el verano soy el Sr. Verde. Think what you like of this. Piensa lo que quieras de esto. I say it of my own free will. Lo digo por mi propia voluntad. Wimble click crumblechaw beloo. Wimble haga clic en crumblechaw beloo. It is beautiful, is it not? Es hermoso, ¿no es así? I make up words like this all the time. Invento palabras como esta todo el tiempo. That can't be helped. Eso no se puede evitar. They just come out of my mouth by themselves. Simplemente salen de mi boca por sí mismos. They cannot be translated. No se pueden traducir.

“Ask and ask. “Pregunta y pregunta. It does no good. No sirve de nada. But I will tell you. Pero te lo diré. I don't want you to be sad, Mr. Auster. No quiero que esté triste, Sr. Auster. You have such a kind face. Tienes una cara tan amable. You remind me of a somesuch or a groan, I don't know which. Me recuerdas a algo así oa un gemido, no sé cuál. And your eyes look at me. Y tus ojos me miran. Yes, yes. Sí Sí. I can see them. Puedo verlos. That is very good. Eso es muy bueno. Thank you. Gracias.

“That is why I will tell you. “Es por eso que te lo diré. No questions, please. Sin preguntas, por favor. You are wondering about all the rest. Usted se está preguntando acerca de todo lo demás. That is to say, the father. Es decir, el padre. The terrible father who did all those things to little Peter. El terrible padre que le hizo todas esas cosas al pequeño Peter. Rest assured. Está seguro. They took him to a dark place. Lo llevaron a un lugar oscuro. They locked him up and left him there. Lo encerraron y lo dejaron allí. Ha ha ha. Excuse me. Sometimes I am so funny. A veces soy tan gracioso.

“Thirteen years, they said. “Trece años, dijeron. That is perhaps a long time. Eso es quizás mucho tiempo. But I know nothing of time. Pero no sé nada del tiempo. I am new every day. Soy nuevo todos los días. I am born when I wake up in the morning, I grow old during the day, and I die at night when I go to sleep. Nazco cuando me despierto por la mañana, envejezco durante el día y muero por la noche cuando me voy a dormir. It is not my fault. No es mi culpa. I am doing so well today. Lo estoy haciendo muy bien hoy. I am doing so much better than I have ever done before. Lo estoy haciendo mucho mejor que nunca antes.

“For thirteen years the father was away. “Durante trece años el padre estuvo fuera. His name is Peter Stillman too. Su nombre es Peter Stillman también. Strange, is it not? Extraño, ¿no? That two people can have the same name? ¿Que dos personas pueden tener el mismo nombre? I do not know if that is his real name. No sé si ese es su verdadero nombre. But I do not think he is me. Pero no creo que él sea yo. We are both Peter Stillman. Ambos somos Peter Stillman. But Peter Stillman is not my real name. Pero Peter Stillman no es mi verdadero nombre. So perhaps I am not Peter Stillman, after all. Así que tal vez yo no sea Peter Stillman, después de todo.

“Thirteen years I say. “Trece años digo. Or they say. O dicen. It makes no difference. No hace ninguna diferencia. I know nothing of time. No sé nada del tiempo. But what they tell me is this. Pero lo que me dicen es esto. Tomorrow is the end of thirteen years. Mañana es el final de trece años. That is bad. Eso es malo. Even though they say it is not, it is bad. Aunque digan que no lo es, es malo. I am not supposed to remember. Se supone que no debo recordar. But now and then I do, in spite of what I say. Pero de vez en cuando lo hago, a pesar de lo que digo.

“He will come. "Él vendrá. That is to say, the father will come. Es decir, vendrá el padre. And he will try to kill me. Y tratará de matarme. Thank you. Gracias. But I do not want that. Pero no quiero eso. No, no. No no. Not anymore. Ya no. Peter lives now. Pedro vive ahora. Yes. Sí. All is not right in his head, but still he lives. No todo está bien en su cabeza, pero aún así vive. And that is something, is it not? Y eso es algo, ¿no? You bet your bottom dollar. Apuestas tu último dólar. Ha ha ha.

“I am mostly now a poet. “Soy sobre todo ahora un poeta. Every day I sit in my room and write another poem. Todos los días me siento en mi habitación y escribo otro poema. I make up all the words myself, just like when I lived in the dark. Yo mismo invento todas las palabras, como cuando vivía en la oscuridad. I begin to remember things that way, to pretend that I am back in the dark again. Empiezo a recordar las cosas de esa manera, a fingir que estoy otra vez en la oscuridad. I am the only one who knows what the words mean. Soy el único que sabe lo que significan las palabras. They cannot be translated. No se pueden traducir. These poems will make me famous. Estos poemas me harán famoso. Hit the nail on the head. Darle al clavo en la cabeza. Ya, ya, ya. Ya, ya, ya. Beautiful poems. Hermosos poemas. So beautiful the whole world will weep. Tan hermoso que el mundo entero llorará.

“Later perhaps I will do something else. “Después tal vez haga otra cosa. After I am done being a poet. Después de que termine de ser poeta. Sooner or later I will run out of words, you see. Tarde o temprano me quedaré sin palabras, ya ves. Everyone has just so many words inside him. Todo el mundo tiene tantas palabras dentro de él. And then where will I be? ¿Y entonces dónde estaré? I think I would like to be a fireman after that. Creo que me gustaría ser bombero después de eso. And after that a doctor. Y después de eso un médico. It makes no difference. No hace ninguna diferencia. The last thing I will be is a high-wire walker. Lo último que seré es un equilibrista. When I am very old and have at last learned how to walk like other people. Cuando sea muy viejo y haya aprendido por fin a caminar como los demás. Then I will dance on the wire, and people will be amazed. Entonces bailaré en la cuerda floja y la gente se asombrará. Even little children. Incluso los niños pequeños. That is what I would like. Eso es lo que me gustaría. To dance on the wire until I die. Para bailar en el alambre hasta que me muera.

“But no matter. "Pero no importa. It makes no difference. No hace ninguna diferencia. To me. As you can see, I am a rich man. Como puedes ver, soy un hombre rico. I do not have to worry. No tengo que preocuparme. No, no. No no. Not about that. No sobre eso. You bet your bottom dollar. Apuestas tu último dólar. The father was rich, and little Peter got all his money after they locked him up in the dark. El padre era rico y el pequeño Peter obtuvo todo su dinero después de que lo encerraron en la oscuridad. Ha ha ha. Jajaja. Excuse me for laughing. Disculpe por reírme. Sometimes I am so funny. A veces soy tan gracioso.

“I am the last of the Stillmans. Soy el último de los Stillman. That was quite a family, or so they say. Era toda una familia, o eso dicen. From old Boston, in case you might have heard of it. Del viejo Boston, en caso de que hayas oído hablar de él. I am the last one. soy el ultimo There are no others. No hay otros. I am the end of everyone, the last man. Soy el final de todos, el último hombre. So much the better, I think. Tanto mejor, creo. It is not a pity that it should all end now. No es una pena que todo termine ahora. It is good for everyone to be dead. Es bueno que todos estén muertos.

“The father was perhaps not really bad. “El padre quizás no era realmente malo. At least I say so now. Al menos lo digo ahora. He had a big head. Tenía una cabeza grande. As big as very big, which meant there was too much room in there. Tan grande como muy grande, lo que significaba que había demasiado espacio allí. So many thoughts in that big head of his. Tantos pensamientos en esa gran cabeza suya. But poor Peter, was he not? Pero pobre Peter, ¿no? And in terrible straits indeed. Y en terribles aprietos, de hecho. Peter who could not see or say, who could not think or do. Pedro que no podía ver ni decir, que no podía pensar ni hacer. Peter who could not. Pedro que no pudo. No. Not anything. Nada de nada.

“I know nothing of any of this. “No sé nada de nada de esto. Nor do I understand. Ni yo entiendo. My wife is the one who tells me these things. Mi esposa es la que me dice estas cosas. She says it is important for me to know, even if I do not understand. Ella dice que es importante que yo sepa, incluso si no entiendo. But even this I do not understand. Pero incluso esto no lo entiendo. In order to know, you must understand. Para saber hay que entender. Is that not so? ¿No es así? But I know nothing. Pero no sé nada. Perhaps I am Peter Stillman, and perhaps I am not. Quizás soy Peter Stillman, y quizás no lo soy. My real name is Peter Nobody. Mi verdadero nombre es Peter Nadie. Thank you. Gracias. And what do you think of that? ¿Y qué piensas de eso?

“So I am telling you about the father. “Así que te estoy hablando del padre. It is a good story, even if I do not understand it. Es una buena historia, incluso si no la entiendo. I can tell it to you because I know the words. Puedo decírtelo porque conozco las palabras. And that is something, is it not? Y eso es algo, ¿no? To know the words, I mean. Para saber las palabras, quiero decir. Sometimes I am so proud of myself! ¡A veces estoy tan orgullosa de mí misma! Excuse me. Perdóneme. This is what my wife says. Esto es lo que dice mi esposa. She says the father talked about God. Ella dice que el padre habló de Dios. That is a funny word to me. Esa es una palabra graciosa para mí. When you put it backwards, it spells dog. Cuando lo pones al revés, deletrea perro. And a dog is not much like God, is it? Y un perro no se parece mucho a Dios, ¿verdad? Woof woof. Guau guau. Bow wow. Guau guau. Those are dog words. Esas son palabras de perro. I think they are beautiful. Creo que son hermosos. So pretty and true. Tan bonito y cierto. Like the words I make up. Como las palabras que invento.

“Anyway. "De todas formas. I was saying. Estaba diciendo. The father talked about God. El padre habló de Dios. He wanted to know if God had a language. Quería saber si Dios tenía un lenguaje. Don't ask me what this means. No me preguntes qué significa esto. I am only telling you because I know the words. Sólo te lo digo porque sé las palabras. The father thought a baby might speak it if the baby saw no people. El padre pensó que un bebé podría hablarlo si no veía a nadie. But what baby was there? Pero, ¿qué bebé estaba allí? Ah. ah Now you begin to see. Ahora empiezas a ver. You did not have to buy him. No tenías que comprarlo. Of course, Peter knew some people words. Por supuesto, Peter conocía las palabras de algunas personas. That could not be helped. Eso no se pudo evitar. But the father thought maybe Peter would forget them. Pero el padre pensó que tal vez Peter los olvidaría. After a while. Después de un tiempo. That is why there was so much boom, boom, boom. Por eso hubo tanto boom, boom, boom. Every time Peter said a word, his father would boom him. Cada vez que Peter decía una palabra, su padre lo abucheaba. At last Peter learned to say nothing. Por fin Peter aprendió a no decir nada. Ya ya ya. Ya ya ya. Thank you. Gracias.

“Peter kept the words inside him. “Peter mantuvo las palabras dentro de él. All those days and months and years. Todos esos días y meses y años. There in the dark, little Peter all alone, and the words made noise in his head and kept him company. Allí, en la oscuridad, el pequeño Peter solo, y las palabras hacían ruido en su cabeza y le hacían compañía. That is why his mouth does not work right. Por eso su boca no funciona bien. Poor Peter. Pobre Pedro. Boo hoo. Boo hoo. Such are his tears. Así son sus lágrimas. The little boy who can never grow up. El niño que nunca puede crecer.

“Peter can talk like people now. “Peter puede hablar como la gente ahora. But he still has the other words in his head. Pero todavía tiene las otras palabras en su cabeza. They are God's language, and no one else can speak them. Son el lenguaje de Dios, y nadie más puede hablarlos. They cannot be translated. No se pueden traducir. That is why Peter lives so close to God. Por eso Pedro vive tan cerca de Dios. That is why he is a famous poet. Por eso es un poeta famoso.

“Everything is so good for me now. “Todo es tan bueno para mí ahora. I can do whatever I like. Puedo hacer lo que quiera. Any time, any place. En cualquier momento, en cualquier lugar. I even have a wife. Incluso tengo una esposa. You can see that. Puedes ver eso. I mentioned her before. La mencioné antes. Perhaps you have even met her. Tal vez incluso la hayas conocido. She is beautiful, is she not? Ella es hermosa, ¿no es así? Her name is Virginia. Su nombre es Virginia. That is not her real name. Ese no es su verdadero nombre. But that makes no difference. Pero eso no hace ninguna diferencia. To me. A mi.

“Whenever I ask, my wife gets a girl for me. “Cada vez que pido, mi esposa me consigue una niña. They are whores. son putas I put my worm inside them and they moan. Pongo mi gusano dentro de ellos y gimen. There have been so many. Ha habido tantos. Ha ha. They come up here and I fuck them. Vienen aquí y me los follo. It feels good to fuck. Se siente bien follar. Virginia gives them money and everyone is happy. Virginia les da dinero y todos están felices. You bet your bottom dollar. Apuestas tu último dólar. Ha ha.

“Poor Virginia. “Pobre Virginia. She does not like to fuck. A ella no le gusta follar. That is to say, with me. Es decir, conmigo. Perhaps she fucks another. Quizás se folla a otro. Who can say? ¿Quién puede decir? I know nothing of this. No sé nada de esto. It makes no difference. No hace ninguna diferencia. But maybe if you are nice to Virginia she will let you fuck her. Pero tal vez si eres amable con Virginia, te dejará follarla. It would make me happy. Me haría feliz. For your sake. Por tu bien. Thank you. Gracias.

“So. "Asi que. There are a great many things. Hay muchas cosas. I am trying to tell them to you. Estoy tratando de decírtelo. I know that all is not right in my head. Sé que no todo está bien en mi cabeza. And it is true, yes, and I say this of my own free will, that sometimes I just scream and scream. Y es cierto, sí, y lo digo por mi propia voluntad, que a veces solo grito y grito. For no good reason. Sin una buena razón. As if there had to be a reason. Como si tuviera que haber una razón. But for none that I can see. Pero para ninguno que pueda ver. Or anyone else. O cualquier otra persona. No. No. And then there are the times when I say nothing. Y luego están los momentos en que no digo nada. For days and days on end. Durante días y días seguidos. Nothing, nothing, nothing. Nada, nada, nada. I forget how to make the words come out of my mouth. Olvidé cómo hacer que las palabras salieran de mi boca. Then it is hard for me to move. Entonces me cuesta moverme. Ya ya. Ya ya. Or even to see. O incluso para ver. That is when I become Mr. Sad. Entonces es cuando me convierto en el Sr. Triste.

“I still like to be in the dark. “Todavía me gusta estar en la oscuridad. At least sometimes. Al menos a veces. It does me good, I think. Me hace bien, creo. In the dark I speak God's language and no one can hear me. En la oscuridad hablo el idioma de Dios y nadie puede oírme. Do not be angry, please. No te enojes, por favor. I cannot help it. No puedo evitarlo.

“Best of all, there is the air. “Lo mejor de todo es el aire. Yes. Sí. And little by little, I have learned to live inside it. Y poco a poco he aprendido a vivir en su interior. The air and the light, yes, that too, the light that shines on all things and puts them there for my eyes to see. El aire y la luz, sí, eso también, la luz que ilumina todas las cosas y las pone ahí para que mis ojos las vean. There is the air and the light, and this best of all. Está el aire y la luz, y esto es lo mejor de todo. Excuse me. Perdóneme. The air and the light. El aire y la luz. Yes. When the weather is good, I like to sit by the open window. Cuando hace buen tiempo, me gusta sentarme junto a la ventana abierta. Sometimes I look out and watch the things below. A veces miro hacia afuera y observo las cosas de abajo. The street and all the people, the dogs and cars, the bricks of the building across the way. La calle y toda la gente, los perros y los coches, los ladrillos del edificio de enfrente. And then there are the times when I close my eyes and just sit there, with the breeze blowing on my face, and the light inside the air, all around me and just beyond my eyes, and the world all red, a beautiful red inside my eyes, with the sun shining on me and my eyes. Y luego están los momentos en que cierro los ojos y simplemente me siento allí, con la brisa soplando en mi cara, y la luz dentro del aire, a mi alrededor y más allá de mis ojos, y el mundo todo rojo, un hermoso rojo por dentro. mis ojos, con el sol brillando sobre mí y mis ojos.

“It is true that I rarely go out. “Es verdad que salgo pocas veces. It is hard for me, and I am not always to be trusted. Es difícil para mí, y no siempre se me puede confiar. Sometimes I scream. A veces grito. Do not be angry with me, please. No te enfades conmigo, por favor. I cannot help it. No puedo evitarlo. Virginia says I must learn how to behave in public. Virginia dice que debo aprender a comportarme en público. But sometimes I cannot help myself, and the screams just come out of me. Pero a veces no puedo evitarlo y los gritos simplemente salen de mí.

“But I do love going to the park. “Pero me encanta ir al parque. There are the trees, and the air and the light. Están los árboles, y el aire y la luz. There is good in all that, is there not? Hay algo bueno en todo eso, ¿no es así? Yes. Sí. Little by little, I am getting better inside myself. Poco a poco voy mejorando por dentro. I can feel it. Puedo sentirlo. Even Dr. Wyshnegradsky says so. Incluso el Dr. Wyshnegradsky lo dice. I know that I am still the puppet boy. Sé que sigo siendo el niño títere. That cannot be helped. Eso no se puede evitar. No, no. No no. Anymore. Ya no. But sometimes I think I will at last grow up and become real. Pero a veces pienso que por fin creceré y me volveré real.

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